Beyond Control

Chapter 23

~*Wei Wuxian's POV*~

Shijie was a good person and she was always someone I could count on. How can I keep these things from her? How much longer before my secret actually makes it to her or Jiang's Cheng without me saying it to them myself.

"I want to tell you...but I don't want Jiang Cheng to know...maybe one day I will have the courage to tell him but right now, I can't," I told her.

"I want to know, normally I wouldn't advise keeping A'Cheng out of this but if you want to open up to me, I will listen. I will also let you be the one to speak with your brother, no matter what it is," she said.

I sighed, "you won't like any of it," I told her.

"Please A'Xian?" She begged.

I saw Xichen-Ge put a privacy barrier up over the room, "it's up to you now, A'Xian," He said and sat down in his spot.

I took in a deep breath, "do you remember, when Jiang Cheng went missing after Lotus Pier was attacked?"

She nodded, "I was sick but I still remember."

"Jiang Cheng was captured by Wen Chao. Wen Zhuliu melted his golden core. A Wen disciple named Wen Ning, helped me get Jiang Cheng out of their hands. Wen Ning took me to a secret located where is sister was. While we were there, I looked for ways I can help Jiang Cheng, as he couldn't run a sect without his core. I ended up finding a way. So Wen Qing and I tricked Jiang Cheng. We led him to a mountain, saying my old grandmaster Baosh Sanren was located there.

Wen Qing came around pretending to be her and knocked him out. That was when Wen Ning and I came out. I spent two nights and a day, having Wen Qing...take out my golden core and give it to Jiang Cheng...."

"What?" She asked a bit shocked, "you worked so hard to get such a strong core and you just gave it to him?"

"He needed it to run the sect, he was talking about taking his life away and being miserable. I couldn't just let him waste away," I answered.

"Oh, XianXian?!" She said.

"After the procedure, I waited several days for him down the mountain, but he never showed up. I went into a nearby tea house and was captured by Wen Chao. I was tortured, beaten, thrown, and I have so many broken bones. He took me out high above the Burial Mounds and pushed me in. The resentful energy captured me and made sure I didn't land hard on the ground. I spent three months in there learning to control it. Creating Chenqing and the Amulet.

"Zewu Jun was the first person I managed to open up to. Since then, his sect has been very kind in helping me heal. I have even come to learn, even though Jiang Cheng couldn't have cultivated a new one, I can. I can cultivate a new golden core but I have to heal properly first. The process is taking a very long time and I am so sorry I have been keeping it from you...it's just, Jiang Cheng cares too much for his cultivation. If he found out what I did for him, all of his achievements, he would feel as if he was cheated. Being shadowed by me...I will tell him...maybe someday but right now, I want to heal first."

"A'Xian, thank you for telling me, and I don't I'll let you talk to Jiang Cheng when you are ready. I will keep him busy. I want you to continue to heal and cultivate again...can you do that," she said.

"You're not mad?" I asked.

"Little fool, I can't be mad at you," she said, "you are so selfless, A'Xian. When will you ever properly think for yourself."

"I do," I told him. She glared at me, "okay...don't look at me like that."

She then looked at Lan Zhan, "did you tell him yet?" She asked.

"Tell him what?" I asked.

"That you are in love with him?" She asked.

"How could you possibly know that?" I asked.

"Why else would you ask me, why a person would like another?" She mocked.

"XianXian said no such thing," I said.

"Look at you, being mischievous again...how old are you?" She played.

"XianXian is three," I said playfully.

"Are you sure? I thought you were more closely to one," she said.

"No, three," I said.

I looked up at Xichen-Ge and glared at him because he was making a face at me, "don't look at me like that!"

"Young Maiden Jiang, to answer your question, he and my brother have confessed and I have seen them kiss not long ago," Xichen-Ge stated.

I sighed and looked at Lan Zhan, "does he do that often?"

He nodded, "he does."

"It's good to know you two are finally working things out," Shijie said, "I should get back."

"Oh, you and Pea- I mean Jin Zixuan? You still?" I asked.

"We are working through things," she said standing, "now, I will see you later. Behave in Gusu."

"I will," I told her and then watched her leave.

***

~*Lan Xichen's POV*~

I was glad that Wei Wuxian had the courage to talk to his sister about his past. She was pained to hear it all but she was still able to listen to him. That and she will support his discussions. That is what I am happy about. Wangji was soon on his bed meditating, as he would before bed. Wuxian was sitting at the table still, his Dizi was him his hand. So I decided to sit beside him.

"Chenqing, right?" I asked.

He nodded, "Chenqing has only ever accepted me. She won't let others tough her. I am hoping once I am able to cultivate properly again, I can find a way to cleanse Chenqing."

"Her?" I asked.

"I don't know why, but I see Chenqing as a she," he said.

"Was there a reason behind the name? What made you think of Chenqing?" I asked.

"Qing refers to feelings or a situation. With Chenqing, a silent desire to tell my side of the story," he said.

"Oh, it's nice," I told him, "I think you told Wangji, but what about your sword? You called your sword Suibian?"

He laughed a bit, "when Uncle Jiang Fengmian first gave it to me, he ask me what I wanted the name to be. I thought of several names but wasn't satisfied with any of them. So I just said Suibian (whatever). Next thing I know, the name was engraved onto the sword. It can be kind of fun telling serious cultivators about the name. Some get the joke and some don't."

"Oh," I said, "within the mounds, learning Chenqing, how did you learn to play? Could you read music?"

"I don't know why but it was like I had some knowledge on how to play a Dizi. I picked it up and learned it fairly quickly. I can read music sometimes, but most of the time, I just have to hear the tune once, and I can play it again," he said, "although there is one song that I keep going back to. It keeps me calm so I find myself humming it or wanting to play it in Chenqing."

"What is that?" I asked.

"I don't know the name," he said, "I heard Lan Zhan play it. I was sick in Xuanwu's cave. He played it. I asked for the name but I passed out before I could hear him tell me."

"If he played it, it might be from our music section," I told him, "can you play a little bit for me? Maybe I know it?"

He nodded and played it a bit. I saw Wangji open his eyes and stare at him. He looked a bit surprised by what Wei Wuxian was playing.

"I've never heard it," I said after he stopped playing.

"Either way, I still like it. It helps me calm down and I feel soothed by it," Wuxian said. I glanced at Wangji again and I saw it. A smile appeared on his face. It was a smile of appreciation and adoration. Seeing him smiling again, it was like seeing the sun shining over freshly made snow.