Beyond Control

Chapter 4

I walked with Wei Wuxian back to Lotus Pier. I have only been here a few times and each time it was always slightly different. There were disciples training as they were new. Jiang Wanyin spent a lot of time rebuilding the sect. I can imagine how hard it must be for Wuxian to just sit by and watch. He was one who loved his sword but for the promise and his care for his sworn brother, he gave that up. I need to apologize to Wuxian for my words about being selfish. Wei Wuxian was far from selfish, he was selfless beyond selfless. I began to wonder if he ever really cared for himself or anyone really took the time to look at him and give him the proper care he needed.

"Wei Wuxian!" I heard Jiang Wanyin yell, "where have you been?"

I could see the the despair and guilt in Wei Wuxian's eyes. I decided to step in, "Sect Leader Jiang," I greeted, "I am sorry for keeping your head disciple. We met in town and got lost in conversation."

"Oh, Sect Leader Lan," he greeted, "it is alright, though I wish Wei Wuxian would tell me if he leaves Lotus Pier. I don't want to have to send search parties out for him. We already lost him once...wherever he was."

He never even told his sworn siblings about the mounds...Wei Wuxian, why must you do this to yourself?

"I was actually telling Wei Wuxian about some corpses near Cloud Recesses and I came with him to ask you if I can borrow his time for a little while?" I asked.

"Oh, of course, maybe he can be of more use for you," he said, "he doesn't seem interested in anything here."

"A'Cheng?" I heard a female voice call out, "that was not nice!"

"Young Maiden Jiang," I greeted, "I was telling Sect Leader Jiang about some corpses in Gusu and asked if Wei Wuxian could assist me for a little while."

"Of course he can," Maiden Jiang said, "please come home safely, A'Xian."

"Thank you, Shijie," Wuxian said, "I'll be back soon Jiang Cheng."

"Be careful," he said sternly.

"Thank you," I said with a bow, "if you need to gather anything, you can," I told Wei Wuxian.

He nodded and went to gather some things as I waited for him here. Jiang Wanyin went back to training disciples but young maiden Jiang stayed beside me.

"You are not going after corpses are you?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I know something is wrong with A'Xian, he just chooses not to say. He doesn't like to worry us about anything. Especially when it is about himself. I noticed changes in him and I wish to help him, but he has been distant, even with me. He used to come to me about everything but he hasn't since we got back to Lotus Pier," she explained, "if you know what is wrong, I understand that you are probably not saying so because you promised not to. All I asked is to make sure that A'Xian is okay. He doesn't know how to take care of himself very well."

It eased my mind a bit knowing that Jiang Yanli can notice such changes with Wei Wuxian. I can understand Wei Wuxian from keeping things from her as she is very important to him.

"I promise, I will do what I can for him," I assured her.

"Thank you, Sect Leader Lan...and please do something about his oblivious head about your brother," she said with a smirk, "all he talks about is Lan Wangji this and Lan Wangji that."

I let out a chuckle, "I will try," I told her.

She nodded and looked behind her as we heard Wei Wuxian jogging back to us. He just had a small back that he put some robes into. He didn't carry much but I understood.

"Hey! Wei Wuxian?" I heard Jiang Wanyin yelled. I then saw him toss Wei Wuxian his sword. I saw the sadness wash over his eyes knowing he can't use it, "take it with you," he said.

"Mnn," Wuxian nodded and turned to me, "I'm ready when you are."

I nodded, "farewell," I said to his siblings and left with Wei Wuxian at my side.

On the outskirts of Yunmeng I stopped, "what?" He asked.

"I can let you fly with me on my sword," I told him.

"Ugh, it's not that I don't trust you it's just...I am a bit afraid," he said shyly.

"I will not drop you," I assured him.

He let out a sigh and then nodded. I helped him hop on and then flew off. I could feel him trembling under me as I held him steady. He really was terrified. I held him close and rubbed my hand to his back to keep him calm.

"You are so kind, Zewu Jun," he told me.

"You can call me Xichen-Ge," I told him, "or Er-Ge. I want you to know that I want to be like another brother to you. An older brother."

"Really?" He asked, "an older sounds nice. You can continue to call me A'Xian if you want. I don't care much for formalities."

"Very well, A'Xian," I said.

"How will you convince Grandmaster Lan about me?" He asked.

"I will tell him a slight truth while hiding the obvious ones. Just tell him we are helping you cleanse your body," I said.

"Would he believe me if he knows too? Talk to him and Lan Zhan together?" He asked.

"If he knows, he would want to help you more," he said, "it is your decision to make."

"I know he doesn't like me much but I respect him as my elder and I will trust his judgment if he is willing to listen. I just ask if you would be there as I tell him and Lan Zhan," he suggested.

"Of course," I said.

It took a little while to get to Cloud Recesses but when we did, I landed just outside the gates. Wei Wuxian followed me inside and I lead him the Elegance hall.