"Deep down you just want to be loved in a way that calms your soul."
-R.H Sin
_________________________________It was a beautiful day to sit out by the lake. The sky was basically clear and it was just warm enough to actually enjoy the lakes water.
I brought my guitar and sat against the rock we always hung out at, while the rest of my friends swam.
Through my peripherals, I could see Black sitting by the shore, her back against a rock, reading.
I decided to start strumming a few chords when Nott and Riddle grabbed my arm and dragged me to the lake.I groaned.
"Don't be such a pussy and join us!" Nott said, laughing.
We made it to the water and I took off my white button down shirt and got in the lake with them.
We started wrestling and playing catch with a small ball, dunking each other as much as we could.While I was about to get dunked by Nott, he said, "hey Blacks staring at us"
"HEY BLACK— LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?" He yelled.As far as I could tell she just rolled her eyes and started to read again.
As Theo was distracted by her, I took my hands and pushed his head underwater. We continued to steal the ball away from each other for a few moments, but then I became distracted as the rest of Black's friends joined her.
Weaslebee and Granger played Wizard's chess together and Black kept reading as Potter tried to desperately get her attention.
I suppressed a laugh, as I caught the ball from Riddle who was telling me to quit staring.After awhile the boys and I decided to go dry off in the sun. I threw on my button down shirt and made my way over to the rock we were at.
I watched as I saw her and Potter talk. She looked frustrated and the conversation didn't last long before Harry walked away shaking his head and Black stormed off towards the castle.
When I didn't see her at dinner, I knew exactly where she was— the astronomy tower. She goes up there almost every night. The only reason I know this is because sometime first year I started going there too. I needed an escape, somewhere I could go to just get away from everyone when my thoughts got bad.
She'd always beat me there, but honestly, I'd let her. Part of me wanted to get the courage to talk to her and apologize for how much of an ass my family was— I was.. but it never happened.
Sometimes I would stay there and hide under the stairs waiting for her to come down, other times I'd just go back to the dungeons and return later. There were a few times I heard her crying and was tempted to enter, but my pride got the best of me.After dinner I left for the Astronomy tower, determined to talk to her this time.
The entire time up the stairs I tried to find an excuse as to why I would be up in the tower, in case she questioned me.I made it up to the top of the stairs and stood outside the door, I took a deep breath as I entered. She took her sleeve and wiped her eyes as she looked my way. She looked shocked that it was me and I don't blame her.
"Oh I uh, I'll leave... I'm sorry," I said, trying to act as if I didn't purposely meet her here.
"No it's okay I can leave" she said sniffling.
"Are you alright?" I asked as gentle as I could, and walked over to her.
She didn't respond and I was starting to grow nervous. I don't know why I expected her to even talk to me with how I treat her and her friends.
"Have you been up here since earlier?" I asked, trying to break the silence. My hands started sweating with how nervous I was.
She looked out at the sky for a moment, not answering. I thought about giving up and walking away, but she finally answered.
"Yeah.. I just wanted to be alone.." she said quietly.
"What happened?" I asked, sitting down across from her. She looked at me and tried to smile.
"We can talk about it if you need to... or I can sit here with you... or I can leave" I laughed trying to defuse the tension.
"Whichever you prefer" I finished."Since when is Draco Malfoy so nice?" She had finally spoke and I relaxed a little.
"I mean you are crying" I said laughing a little, but trying to show her I wasn't here to bother her.
She stayed quiet again and matched the way I was sitting. She brought her knees to her chest and looked at me as she rested her chin on her knees.
"I'm not here to hurt you, Black," I said as honest as I could. I could feel her eyes looking into my soul, trying to find out if I was here for an ulterior reason.
"It's just Harry.. He told me he liked me.." she said hesitantly.
I sat there for a moment staring at her. I honestly thought her and Potter were dating, or at least liked each other. Obviously, I came to the wrong conclusion.
"And that's a problem?" I finally asked.
"I just don't want things to change between us.." she answered.
"You guys are like family, no?"
"Yeah our families were at Hogwarts together, they all grew very close. Especially fighting in the Wizarding War.. they were," she hesitated for a moment, "a part of the Order.. his parents are my godparents and vis versa," she finished, pulling her knees closer to her chest and resting her head on them. "I don't know why I said that, obviously you know they were a part of the Order.." I watched as her face turned slightly pink in embarrassment.I smiled slightly, "I see, that's actually kind of nice. I don't really have much family besides my mum and dad. Seeing how most of them got thrown into Azkaban during that war." I added a wink so she knew I was being lighthearted, or at least trying to be. I realized I probably shouldn't have said that, because she grew even redder and didn't reply.
Once I realized she wasn't answering, I quickly decided to say, "it's okay you know.. I'm glad they lost, they deserved it," and I shot her a hopeful smile, hoping she understood I didn't hold it against her and that I really meant what I said.
She smiled back a softer smile, and I couldn't tell if she believed me, but I decided to let it go. I watched as she stood from where she was sitting and made her way to the railing.
"You know I come up here most nights," I said in a quick moment of wanting to continue to talk to her.
"You do not because I come up here most nights," She replied back, shocked.
"Well actually you get here first and I just wait till you're done and then come afterwards," I said quietly.
"Listen, why don't I just send my owl to you and I can ask whether or not you are up here, or what time? Then we dont have to run into each other if we dont want to" I suggested, but I was unsure why because I am quite certain I want to meet her up here again."Yeah.. that sounds great," but I could tell she sounded confused at my entire personality switch.
I watched in my peripherals as she turned and walked towards the door. After I was certain she had left, I she said "Hey Malfoy?"
I turned around, leaning against the railing looking at the curly haired girl, "Yeah, Black?"
"Thanks," she smiled.
Her smile really lit up a room, even when it was starting to get dark. I nodded and turned towards the sky watching as the last piece of the sun set in the horizon. My mind started racing with what my father had threatened. I didn't want to be like my father and it killed me I felt like I had to. I stood there thinking for a few more moments before heading fown to the dungeons where the Slytherin dorms were.
_______
** I just think Malfoy needs his time to have a good redemption ark where he isn't a total ass. However like Draco Malfoy always does, he will snap back to his ways eventually.
How are we liking the story? What do we want to see more of? Do we like Draco this way?**
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If the War Never Happened (years 3-4)
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