Stray Kids | Sickfics

Unreal | Seungmin

tw: cursing, verbal abuse

                                                                              ♫

Seungmin's pov

"Stop stop stop. Seungmin! What are you doing? The hell is wrong with you today?"

I didn't dare to look at our dance instructor, instead, I chose to keep my gaze onto the ground. The others stopped to dance and only sounds of intense breathing could be heard in the studio.

"Look at me when I speak to you! Everything you've shown me so far was bad. You keep doing the same mistakes even though I've already told you about them."

Almost shyly, I lifted my head to look at him and god, he's face was so angry. His eyes nearly blazing with fury and his arms wildly swaying around.

"Hello? Are you even listening? If you don't want to improve, you should stay at home. I have no time for whatever this is you are dealing with."

No! I could feel the tears welling up but I managed to keep them in. I wanted to say something but my throat felt sore out of a sudden.

You are so dumb Seungmin. So so dumb.

"Sir, I'm sorry but this is not how you talk to my member. I can assure you that he is trying to improve and to me, his dancing seemed fine."

Chan stepped to my side and laid an arm on my shoulder which made me feel embarassed somehow. Like I nedded someone to defend me because I couldn't do so on my own. But he was right, I couldn't do it on my own.

"Fine is nowhere near good! I am your dance teacher and if you want to achieve something you have to do better than this. Right now you are failing my expectations Seungmin, and as a leader Bangchan, you should know it better", he shouted before shaking his head.

I could feel Chan's grip tensing at these words. "Uhm, excuse me, but you are in no place to tell me how I should lead my group."

The room went silent for a few seconds. It was suffocating. Everyone was looking between Chan and the dance teacher who seemed even more angry now. He only huffed in response before slowly walking closer to me.

"You don't want to burden your team, right?", he asked, his voice suddenly calmer.

I widened my eyes but nodded either way. What was he about to do?

"Then get your fucking act together and practice for once! You'll only drag your members down."

I heard the others gasp which only made the situation worse. I was about to say something when the teacher already stormed out of the studio, slamming the door behind him. After that the room was silent again.

Ashamed of myself, I couldn't even look at the others. Their faces filled with pity. I didn't want that. I knew I screwed up.

My dancing wasn't fine, it was bad, really bad.

I know I should've practiced more, put more thoughts into the steps but everything seemed so hard. Like my mind was somewhere else and my body being ten times heavier than usual.

"Min, I'm so sorry, we'll do something about him", Chan suddenly cleared his throat, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"And I can help you with the choreography okay? Together we can do this!" I managed to give Minho a small smile as he patted my head gently.

"Come, let's do it now", he said and instantly started to dance. I didn't even have time to recover from what happened earlier but Minho was right. If I wanted to improve, I had to do better.

Immediately, I followed his movements and tried my best but my muscles felt so sore and legs like gummy. What's wrong with me? I looked at the reflection in the mirror just to see how sloppy I was dancing. This couldn't be me, right? Just fucking dance Seungmin! Dance! DANCE!

I tried my hardest but I had no control over my body. A dizzines washed over me like a wave and pulled me into the darkness that seemed endless. B-but. What's that? There was something. A voice?

"min"

"gmin?"

"SEUNGMIN!"

With a gasp I opened my eyes, startled by the cold air blowing in my face.

"Oh thank god, you're alive", someone said, a sigh of relief following shortly after.

Just then I got a clear vision of my surroundings. It was still dark but it was my room and I was in my bed. Oh. I was dreaming. It was a dream. Just a dream.

Looking to my right, I saw Hyunjin worriedly staring at me although his eyes indicated that it was in the middle of the night.

"Are you alright? You were screaming earlier". Screaming?

"J-just a bad dream", I managed to say but my voice came out quiet and hoarse.

"You sure? You are shaking Min", he replied, his soft eyes meeting mine. I felt like crying again. I knew it was just a dream but still, it felt so real. It could have been real.

"Is m-my dancing bad?"

I watched how his face expression changed into confusion and worry. "What? No, of course not! Why would you think that?"

I took a deep breath and wiped the tears away that were suddenly rolling down my cheeks.

"Oh Min, don't cry, please. Whatever happened in this dream, it wasn't real. You know you are an amazing dancer. You are doing so well", he whispered while holding me closely.

"Don't you ever doubt yourself."

-----------------------------------------------

Finally an update! I'm so sorry, I had lots of school stuff to do, including an important presentation that required a lot of my energy and courage. As someone who is dealing with social anxiety and panic attacks, I was so scared of that presentation that I restricted myself from doing the things I love, like writing.

I don't know why I stressed myself so much about this one thing...anyways, I'm back at writing though I don't know how consistent I'll update. I already have to prepare for my graduation which is very soon but after that, I'm finally done with school!! Sorry for the long text, I hope you're all doing great and have wonderful Easter holidays!

See you next time :)

-----------------------------------------------