Generations: The Long Game

Going Away

TW: regarding consent and non-consensual acts

Reece you have got to be kidding me! There has to be something closer. I want to be able to see my children." Lynn and Lucy were already clued in on the issue to some extent. They often made themselves scarce. It broke her heart. They looked at her with a mix of pity and fear. She would never hurt any of them, but her sweet girls weren't so sure anymore.

Her drinking had gotten out of hand. After years of self medicating, she, Reece, and Autumn seldom actually felt the effects of alcohol. She had been drunk numerous times in the last few months. Charlotte had started locking her out of the room, and it pained her to think that she had done that out of fear.

Mia walked to the kitchen where Charlotte was still tidying. She wasn't sure how to tell her about Reece's plan or how she had already agreed to go. She knew she had no choice in the matter. Reece's plan was her best bet at getting through this with her family intact. She couldn't even bear the thought of Charlotte reaching her limit and leaving. She knew she wouldn't take the children from her, but the loss of Charlotte would end her.

"Charlotte, Reecy and I have come up with a plan. There is a clinic that specializes in trauma therapies and some specific forms of therapy that have been especially effective in birth trauma. It is intensive and inpatient. The clinic is in the U.S."

"Wait! What? You are going to the United States? I ... I thought we could find something local. Somewhere the children would have access to. How long will you need to be there?

Mia couldn't tell if Charlotte was angry or just trying to come to terms with what was happening. She would be left to care for five children all by herself and Mia worried that if she struggled, she would resent her. She also worried that if she settled into that life, she would realize she didn't need Mia anymore. What if leaving was what ended their relationship?

"Charlotte, the program is minimum three months. It can be extended if they feel I need it."

"Oh, I see," Char replied.

Charlotte was feeling everything and nothing all at once. She had no idea how she was going to manage for three months on her own with five children. This certainly hadn't been either of their plans, and wasn't Mia's fault. "You'll miss Christmas?"

Mia could see Charlotte was struggling to come to terms with the plan. They both knew this was the best chance they had. Especially after last weekend. She felt her face begin to burn and the acid threatened to come up her throat at the mere thought of it.

The night was a bit of a blur, but she remembered enough to be deeply ashamed and angry at herself. She, Aut, and Shibby had gotten together and drank far too much wine. She more than the others. By the time she stumbled in the house everyone was soundly asleep. She sat in the nursery watching the boys for what felt like forever. Her mind was reeling even through the haze of alcohol. She couldn't stop thinking. She couldn't stop herself. Even as her mind screamed to her. She stumbled her way into the spare room where a sleeping Charlotte was blissfully unaware of her presence. Something primal rose in Mia as she climbed in bed with her. She should have just gone to sleep and enjoyed the night of physical closeness the alcohol was affording her, but she didn't. She began to kiss and caress Charlotte. Lost in the physicality they had been lacking these last three months, she allowed things to really heat up. Charlotte's body was responding in all the right ways for her, but in her inebriated state she failed to realize that Charlotte wasn't fully awake or aware. As Mia allowed the heat of the moment to drive her as she slipped her hand between Charlotte's legs. In that moment Charlotte's body stiffened. She had fully awakened. She could smell the alcohol on Mia, and anger mixed with fear caused her to push Mia away. "Amelia get off me! You are drunk! I can't believe you! I see in this state you can touch me, but that doesn't mean you have permission to or that you should. Get out!" Mia left the room with shame burning in her chest and ran straight to the bathroom to get sick. After that night Charlotte kept the door to the spare room locked at night.

Shaking the memory and the pain from her head, Mia told her she wouldn't miss Christmas. Arrangements had already been made for her to fly home on the 23rd and then back on the 26th. Only really enough time to be a guest in her own home she thought, but she would do anything not to miss the boys first Christmas.

As Mia prepared dinner the next evening, they chatted about what she needed to pack and how they would communicate once she was there. She would be allowed access to her phone for one hour twice a week. They decided that one hour would be used for them to communicate with out the children and the other would be utilized to keep Mia connected with the children.

They sat down to the table with their children and began to explain the best they could that Mia would be going away in the morning. They tried to reassure the girls that they weren't separating or getting a divorce, but Lynn was having a hard time truly believing them. She had friends with divorced parents and she was old enough to remember when Charlotte and Jack split up. They had tried to make it sound temporary and friendly, but it wasn't.

Charlotte knew the task of reassuring her would land firmly on her shoulders and she felt the weight of it already as she began to tidy up. Mia washed the dishes while Charlotte sat on the other side of the bar trying to soak up what little time they had before Mia would be gone for months. Mia was lost in thought and Charlotte sat there in silence. She remembered a time where silence was so comfortable between them, but now it was as painful as their lack of physical contact. She wanted to hold her tonight, but she knew that, barring Mia getting smashed, that wasn't going to happen. She certainly had no desire to have another interaction with drunk Mia. She couldn't stand the silence anymore and stood up to join the girls in the lounge when Mia's words stopped her.

"Sweetheart, stay. Please." Mia hadn't called her that in awhile and it caused an ache in Charlotte's chest. It was a longing for what could be, what was once. What Charlotte wondered if would ever be again.

AN: thank you, Thenurserynursefan1 for your assistance with this chapter.