Sorry, I'm bad at this. (NSFW AND MATURE CONTENT WARNING) (Lapidot Human AU)

Chapter 7

About 2 weeks have passed, and Lapis had been taking care of me the whole time. I started to feel better about 2 days ago, and everything is back to normal and I'm going back to my classes. And guess what - my feelings for Lapis have only grown stronger and I feel like stuffing myself in a box of scorpions and asking someone to throw it down the river. I still have no idea how Lapis feels about me and it's getting stressful.

Lapis's distant and deadpan attitude makes it extremely hard to read into her. But to be fair, if she didn't care about me, she probably wouldn't have taken care of me - but then again, she could've done that for anyone. It was all just so confusing, and at times I would even be on the verge of tears trying to put any piece of evidence together - BUT NOTHING ADDS UP! I have only come up with two solutions to this painful problem; move to another country, change my name, and pretend that I never met Lapis in the first place and just wallow in my own depression and self pity for the rest of my life...OR just confess my feelings - and the moving away part  sounded so much easier right now.

But I know that I can't run away from my problems forever, so the second option sounded more reasonable at best. I just couldn't think of any way to go about it. I STILL DONT KNOW IF SHE'S GAY! SHE APPARENTLY HAS DATED OTHER GUYS BEFORE! HELL, WHAT IF SHE'S A FUCKING ASEXUAL NOW?!? Lapis was at her class right now, so I paced the room, thinking and scratching different plans and scenarios in my head.

. . . .

Lapis always takes a back route to our dorm from her last class, and I decided to meet her there to confess. That way if she reacted in utter despair and disgust, I would be able to quickly escape the situation by running into the street and getting hit by a car. Okay that's not the main reason I'm meeting her there. The fresh air also helps me concentrate and soothes my stress sometimes so it might make things easier. I checked the time on my phone to make sure my timing was right, and then I put it in my back pocket, walking out the door.

I arrived at the spot, and as I was walking down the sidewalk, faint voices could be heard in the distance. One of the voices belonged to Lapis, and the other belonged to....JASPER?! I ran up to the nearby corner and peeked over it to see what was going on. "Lapis I promise things will be better! Just gimme another chance!" Jasper pleaded, with his gigantic hand wrapped around Lapis's wrist. Lapis then yanked away from his grip and growled. "We're not getting back together Jasper! We screwed up once and I'm not gonna screw up again!" she shouted.

"But babe! Don't you see--" "Don't call me babe! We hurt each other! Think about Malachite! Did you ever give her a chance?!" Lapis yelled, tears filling her eyes. Who? "Lapis, you know I didn't do it on purpose! We were just fighting at the time and--" "So you're telling me throwing me down the stairs while I was pregnant was a complete fucking accident?!" "Lapis please just listen to me!" Jasper pleaded.

"WHAT?!" Lapis hollered, balling her fists. "W-we could try again! H-have another Malachite and act like nothing bad ever happened! We could make it better again, Lapis!" Jasper begged, kneeling on one knee and taking one of her hands in his own. "Jasper...every time we've broken up, you've said things will get better. But they never do. You said having a baby could maybe bring us closer together, but losing Malachite before she even came into this world just showed me that we could never be more incompatible." Lapis said in an almost hurt tone of voice.

"I. Hate. You." she deadpanned, glaring at Jasper. Jasper looked extremely hurt for a moment, but that expression dissipated not a second later when he stood back up and growled. "You wanna hate me? Fine. But I hope you know that you'll never find anyone better than me, brat." Jasper said in a deep voice, pointing a finger in Lapis's face. He then brought his hand back, looking like he was about to slap her across the face, when I jumped from the corner instinctively.

I pretended to be surprised to see them there, as if I was just taking a casual stroll. Jasper looked over at me and his face paled almost immediately. "P-Peridot!" he shouted in a nervous tone of voice. "Hey big bro. I just came to pick Lapis up. Sh-she said that she wanted to hang out somewhere today. Funny seeing you here." I explained, putting my hands in my pockets. "Oh! Y-yeah. Of course. Lapis and I were just...catching up." Jasper said with shifty eyes. "I'm sure you were." I said, slightly glaring at him.

"Come on, Lapis. We're gonna be late for that thing." I claimed, motioning for her to follow me. Lapis played along, and nodded, following me. She looked back at him, then looked at me. We walked away without another word to him. As soon as we were far enough away out of his hearing range, Lapis looked over at me. "Th-thanks...I owe ya." she said, scratching the back of her neck with a slight blush on her cheeks. "Why don't we go actually hang out. You could vent to me." I said, smiling. Lapis slightly smiled back, shrugging a shoulder. "Yeah...okay."