One Way Or Another || Larry Stylinson FF

● 76 ●

Every day it hurt. Always a little more. Every day It was harder to regain my composure after reaching an unprecedented low.

How could I endure this pain for two years? Knowing that Harry had to spend a part of his life in prison because of me.

It was my damn fault. My fault, my fault, my fault.

I cried out in frustration and soon after that the tears came back. Every day I cried, every day I refused to accept that I could not see, hug, and kiss Harry.

And every day I was terrified of going to school because the bullying and beatings were getting worse and worse.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door, which startled me.

''Leave me alone'' I screamed and pulled the blanket over my head.

Despite my refusal, someone entered my room and I could guess who it was.

''Honey, come on, I want to talk to you.''

''I don't want to talk to you!'' I responded and glared at my mother as she pulled back my blanket.

''Love, please let us-''

''Don't fucking call me love. He's allowed to do that. Harry is the only one who's allowed to do that!''

''Why do you mention this pervert, Louis?''

''You stupid ... he is not a pervert! He is the person who means the most to me in this world! I love him! Damn, I love Harry! And I hate you! I hate you so much!''

''What are you talking about, Louis? I am your mother!'' She said with widened eyes.

''You are not my mother!'' I hissed, pointing at her with my finger. ''You don't have the right to call me your son, when you're acting like that. A mother should support and love her kid no matter what. Now look at us, Joannah. You ruined my life. You ruined his life. Harry is my everything. I can't live without him. I don't want to live without him.''

''How dare you say something like that? This man is a fucking pedophile and I won't let him touch you again. You are fifteen and he's twenty-seven, that's not okay. You won't ever see him again.''

''Leave my room, now'' I whispered and cried quietly. ''I hate you.''

Mourning and anger spoke from her eyes, but she left me alone as I wanted.

''I hate the whole world. I hate myself. I hate everyone.''

Silently crying, I ran into the bathroom and vented my anger and the pain as I always did. At least in the recent few days.

With trembling fingers, I reached for the razor blade and pursed the H on my wrist with clenched teeth. Blood dripped onto the floor and into the sink, red as a juicy apple, mingling with my tears.

''But I love you, Harry.''

-

Self harm is never the right solution.

Bye the way I got caught on my phone during the Maths lesson a few minutes ago. Shit happens xD

All the love
Maybe

[501 Words]