Goku X Vegeta Oneshots

Two Weeks

The day Son Goku found a man just sitting in his basement, starving, dehydrated, and filthy, was not a day he was going to forget.

He had just come home from a trip to visit his friends that had lasted almost a month, and he was so happy to be home. First order of business was a shower and a drink. He went downstairs to turn on the water heater, and found the door to the basement... locked. That was odd. He never locked this door. He unlocked it and peered inside, turning on his phone's flashlight. Goku gasped loudly when he saw someone blink back at him. "What the fuck!? Who are you? Wait. Whoa, are you ok?"

The guy looked as if he'd survived a hurricane and a fire in one day. His eyes were still nice and bright, but he looked ready to fall over dead. He didn't even seem to have the strength to reply. Goku came over and helped him up; he was really small and didn't weigh much. He carried him upstairs and set him on the couch. "What the hell happened to you?" Goku asked. "How did you get in my basement?"

"I don't remember," the guy murmured. He had the prettiest voice Goku had ever heard. It was low and rough, but mellifluous. "I don't remember..."

"Ok, hang on just a sec. I'll get you some water and some food." Goku hurried into the kitchen and filled a glass with cool water, bringing it in to him. "What's your name?"

"Vegeta."

Wow. What a beautiful name. Goku went back to the kitchen and brought back leftovers from his trip. "Do you know how long you were in there? Or do you know the day you got there?"

"Um..." Vegeta closed his eyes, thinking. "I think... Maybe May twelfth? Thirteenth?"

Goku's jaw fell open. "Dude, that was, like, two weeks ago. Oh, my God. Are you sure you don't remember how you got there?"

Vegeta shook his head. "I got in a fight with these two guys... and lost. I don't remember anything after that, other than waking up in there. I couldn't see a thing." He held a hand against his head.

"I haven't seen anything on the news about anyone going missing." Goku sat down beside him, worried. "Is there anyone who might have-?"

"Trust me. No one cares enough. Hell, they're probably celebrating my death and drinking." Vegeta tried to stand up, but Goku pushed him back down. He was so weak that he likely wouldn't have stood on his own anyway.

"Ok, what's going on? You're not going anywhere until you rest and tell me what your deal is," said Goku, crossing his arms. "Something tells me that this wasn't some random fight."

"I'm not playing the canary today," Vegeta hissed. "I've played a lot of parts, but I'm not spilling the beans. I'm not going to open myself up to some stranger."

"Yeah, some stranger who saved your life," Goku snapped. "Are you some kind of criminal? You're acting like it."

"And if I am?"

"I don't care. Just tell me what's going on."

Vegeta folded his arms over his chest tightly and looked away. "I'm a high-ranking member of the biggest drug cartel in the country, and in business I'm known as Mask. I'm an actor, an artist. The two men I fought were from another gang. I tried to pull of their dumb southern accent but couldn't quite fool them. They figured out who I was and tried to kill me. I thought they'd succeeded. If I know anything, Frieza is on the hunt now, looking for me. So let me go and you won't have trouble on your doorstep."

Goku blinked, straight-faced. Who hadn't heard of the Mask? He was infamous, a myth. There were stories about him, as amazing as him pulling off a direct copy of a policeman and convincing everyone else, even the man's wife, that the other was fake, to as crazy as playing the part of a prostitute to bring their biggest competitor crashing down. "Um... no."

"What?" Vegeta glared at him. "What do you mean no?"

"Two things: you're not strong enough to up and about yet, and also, I want in." Goku grinned like a child.

Vegeta just stared at him. "Excuse you? In? Why the fuck...? You would die in literally twenty seconds in this job. If you were lucky."

"Ok, then. That means one less pesky civilian for you to worry about later, yeah?"

"You realize I could show up as some pretty blonde looking for a place to stay the night and kill you in your sleep."

"I'm not into blondes. Or girls."

"Oh, my God," Vegeta groaned, rubbing his cheeks. "You're seriously telling me that you're gay?"

Goku held up his fingers in a "just a little" way.

"Fuck, ok. Fine."