Secrets

I lost her.

Luke's P.O.V-

I walk downstairs, my uniform sadly on. I see my mum cooking pancakes and I knew it was because I was upset.

"Morning honey, how many pancakes?"

"I'm not hungry" I say leaving the house. I walk to where Maddie and I would meet but she wasn't there.

I stroll alone down the road and comes to the school gates. I spot Michael and Lena ahead, laughing and joking. I turn to walk away but I feel someone pull me into school.

"Come one Lucas, you're going the wrong way"

"Calum I was going to leave"

"And I won't let you. We have band practise tomorrow so please cheer up"

"I CAN'T CHEER UP!" I shout and everyone looks.

"Luke, calm down"

"Don't you fucking dare tell me to calm down. How can I be calm when one person I cared so deeply about just up and left because of some idiots?" I say and walk to first lesson which was maths.

"Luke?"

"I don't want to talk mum"

"Luke" She says sternly. I walk to her front desk and she looks at me with apologetic eyes.

"Mum, I don't want you to feel sorry for me. I'm fine"

"You're not fine at all luke. Is it because Jack left?" I think. That would make sense and I didn't want to look like I was in love. Was I in love?

"Don't give me all this shit about heartbreak" I say and sit back down. She sighs and continues to work.

I sit down and see her seat beside me. I missed her already and she'd only been gone one day.

The rest of the day went the same, me getting angry at every teacher who tried to help me. I couldn't wait to get home. I walk alone as usual when I feel someone behind me.

"Luke?" Matt asks as I turn around.

"What the hell do you want? Haven't you already got your wish?" I say bitterly.

"I never wanted her to leave"

"No but you did want to hurt her for the rest of her life" I say and he looks down.

"I'm so-"

"Just leave me alone" I walk home and get into the warm air. I throw my bag on the ground and run up to my room.

I collapse on the bed in a heap. All I can do is cry. I cover my head under the covers and let my tears out. I hear my door open and suddenly feel two arms around my back.

"Luke, honey, look at me"

"LEAVE ME ALONE MUM" I scream and she sighs.

"I won't do that. Let it out" I put my head on her shoulder and cry, like a baby.

"Mum, she's gone"

"He'll be back-"

"I'm not talking about Jack! I'm talking about Maddie!" I sigh.

"Luke, it'll be okay, she had no friends anyway. She's happier now"

"I WAS HER FRIEND" I Shout and regret it the minute I do. She looks at me with confusion.

"Sure you helped her with bullies and you helped her with maths but you never spent time with her"

"WE WERE DATING MUM! She meant so much to me" I say and lay on my bed as my mum looks in shock.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was scared you might ruin it. I didn't want many people to know. She's very secretive"

"I get it honey, come here"

"I can't believe she's gone" She gives me a giant hug. It didn't really make a difference but it helped a bit.

"So I'm guessing you're the boy who was very passionate with her inn the library?"

"Yeah... How did you know?"

"Staff meetings. The librarian wouldn't tell us who she was with, I guess now I know why. Did you...you know...sleep with her?"

"Mum, all we did was go on a few dates" I say and we both laugh.

Soon my mum leaves so I sit alone listening to Maddie's favourite song on 'all time low - time bomb'. I was so lost she was gone.

"Hey Luke?" I hear my dad shout up.

"Yeah?"

"Someone left something outside for you" For me? Who would do that?

I walk down stairs to the front door. My parents move slightly and I pick up the box. It had a letter on the lid and I read it:

Dear Luke,

I'm so sorry it had to end like this, you know I never wanted them to get the better of me but they did. I want you to know you were the best thing that happened to me and so I left you this, our song. I haven't done anything useful with it so why don't you use it for you band, do it for me. I'm sorry I had to leave you luke, it's hurting me way more than expected. I promise you'll see me again, even if I have to come back to life like a zombie. I hope your band works out, you guys are awesome! I'm going to really  miss you Luke, be strong for me xxx

From Mads ❤️❤️

I take the CD of the box. I look at it to a while and soon run to my room and play it.

I read through the letter as it plays. How could I let this happen? Why did I let her go?

_________________________________

Longish chapter 😏