JanTom: Complete Opposites

Chapter Thirty-Seven : I...Love You

Chapter Thirty-Seven : I...Love You

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Playlist : Fuyu No Hanashi (Given Soundtrack)

   

       Was I an asshole for never realizing? That all this time, the way he acted towards me..was because he likes me?

       When he always smiled for me, when he always persisted and showered me with compliments that I never deserved. For cheering me up in the worst times, for staying by my side.

     I truly am the worst. I never knew and probably misled him.

      My feet carried me as I never wasted a second, dashing through the wind with my hair sticking out and sweat trickling down my temple. My breath was ragged yet I carried on as if it never affected me.

     It's now or never.

. . .

    I somehow managed to arrive in front of my house with my heart wrenching and my lungs feeling wrung as I clutch to my knees and wheeze, trying to find the words to say..even when I'm looking this disarray.

     My breath was still uneven but I composed myself, my mouth still parted open as my eyes shifted to the front porch and our eyes met.

    I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself but proved wrong when my heart felt like it was going to burst out of me. But still, I need to talk to him.

      It wasn't easy taking the first step. My feet refused to move and felt heavy. My body, in itself, stiffened in the same spot I was in. But I forced my way through and took the the big first leap, my legs finally cooperating as I head towards their front porch with my heart plummeting and anxiety reaching me.

   I can't even look him in the eyes. I could feel his piercing gaze sprung through me as I stood in front of him with the stuffed toy loosely dangling on my fingers and my hair swerving in all directions.

        The important thing right now is that I hear the words coming from him. The truth itself. The reason why he's avoiding me. Why he's acting all distant and why...he likes someone like me.

    "You went on a date with Oskar?" he breaks the silence, with a hostile tone.

     "Yeah," I clutch on the stuffed toy for dear life, like I was going to fall if I don't.

       "Is that why you're here? To tell me you're dating Oskar now?"

       I instantly shot my eyes to look at him and immediately  regretted it. The way those ruby eyes of his glint in melancholy, lips pursed in a bittersweet as he eyed me.

        "No, that's not----"

     "You don't need to hide it," he chuckles sourly, glancing at the floor with his fists clenched. "---I'm just your friend, that's all. I can't say anything or do anything."

       "And you're probably here to tell me I'm getting in the way," he murmurs, his voice faltering. "--that I should leave you alone because Oskar wouldn't like that, would he?"