Undercover

Fear Of Losing You

MATTIA'S POV:

I left Liv asleep in bed and went downstairs for breakfast. There were no butlers in this house, mainly because of how secret it was. We only allowed up to ten soldiers, they were our most trusted ones too.

"So are we just not going to talk about how awful the mission went in the warehouse?" said Kairi as I took a seat at the table. Alejandro rolled his eyes and ignored him completely. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Two people died, Kairi" I said, pouring myself a glass of orange juice.

"And we still missed Maria" he said, putting down his cutlery "we're just adding more fuel to the fire"

"She doesn't have our location, we're safe here" said Alejandro "and besides Liv's vulnerable right now, especially after the shootout last night"

I shot him a thankful look but Kairi wasn't reciprocating the same energy.

"But she-"

"Don't talk shit about Liv" I said, trying to enjoy my food in peace.

"If it wasn't for her, I probably would've been blown up by now" I said, sending shivers down my spine when I remembered how quickly she reacted to the grenade.

"She's also another target for Nikolai 19" said Kairi.

"You claim you care about her and then put her in a position like that?" he said.

"What the fuck else was I supposed to do?" I said loudly, becoming extremely irritated with how pointless this whole conversation was.

"I'm sorry" said Kairi, going back to his food.

"She's one of us now, whether you like it or not" I said, leaving my food at the table and walking out the kitchen.

OLIVIA'S POV:

I woke up to Mattia shouting at someone downstairs, probably a soldier. I decided to get out of bed and went to change my outfit and freshen up before going for breakfast.

I took a shower and walked back into the bedroom with a towel wrapped around my dripping body. Mattia was lying on the bed on his phone and he gave me a small smile when he saw me. But his smile quickly vanished when his eyes went back to his phone.

"What's wrong?" I said, climbing onto the bed and lying next to him.

"Your hair's all wet" he whined, moving away quickly. I rolled my eyes and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him back next to me.

"Shut up and tell me why you're moody"

"I'm not" he mumbled, turning his phone off. I cupped his cheek and turned his face towards me. He looked into my eyes for a second before closing his eyes and resting his forehead against mine.

"I'm scared, Liv" he whispered, wrapping his arms around my waist and burying his head in my chest. I rested my chin on his head and ran my fingers through his hair.

"This shit is so dangerous, and you've been made a target which means they want you dead as much as they want me dead" he said, shaking his head. My stomach twisted a little when he said that, but I should've expected these kind of things when I decided to get involved with him. It's all part of it.

"I'm not going to die, Mattia" I said, chuckling to myself. But he didn't laugh with me, instead he just frowned to himself.

"I only care about you, Liv" he said, tightening his grip around me "I honestly don't give a fuck about anyone else"

I reached out and tilted his chin upwards so I could look at him properly.

"So you're telling me, you would risk the lives of a million people for one life, and that life is mine?"

He nodded, keeping his eyes locked on me.

"Why, Mattia?"

"Cause it's not just one life, it's yours"

I felt my heart skip a beat as tears rose to my eyes. I wasn't used to someone caring for me as much as he did. That just made it even scarier.

I let go of him and turned on my back, and he did the same as we stared up at the white ceiling.

"I'm not scared of death, Liv" he sighed "I'm scared of losing you, because if I lose you, I lose everything"

"Oh my god, stop" I said, wiping my eyes as I sat up in the bed. He sat up too and looked at me, brushing the wet hairs away from my face.

"I'm sorry but-"

"You know what the hardest part of this is?" I said, gesturing between us both "it's the love, Mattia"

"It's not the fights, or the crying. It's the love we have for each other. It's so strong that neither of us can fight it. I've tried to fight it, god I've tried so many times" I said, laughing as another tear slipped down my cheeks. Mattia laughed too, his eyes becoming glassy too.

"But the truth is, I can't" I said, taking ahold of his hand with both of mine.

"I'm always going to love you, Mattia, and I need you to know that"

"You have no idea how long I've waited to hear that come from those lips" he said, his lips curving upwards as he placed a hand on my neck and kissed me slowly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back, deepening the kiss as his hands travelled through my hair. I pulled away and leaned on his shoulder.

"It's us against the world" he said, a smile appearing on his face. I smiled too, finally relieved that we were in a good place. I didn't care if it wasn't going to last for long, this moment was good enough.

I wouldn't have it any other way.