I'm No Good At Goodbyes

Chapter 41

"SiSi baby I am so fucking happy that you are awake" I said, tears running down my cheeks as I looked into her eyes. My hand was still holding onto hers, as I sat myself down on the side of the bed. A small smile appeared on her lips as she reached up towards my cheek, her thumb rubbing the tears away that were slowly streaming down my face. She slowly moved her hand back to the nape of my neck as she gently pushed for me to come towards her. I obliged leaning down as she connected her lips with mine.

"Ocean Eyes, there is no need to cry. I'm here now baby and I'm not going to go anywhere" she said against my lips as she kissed me again. The feeling of her lips on mine sending a wave of comfort through me that I had been missing for so long. "How is Trevor?" she asked me with a smile as I slowly pulled away from her.

I laughed a little as I flashed her a smile. "He is good Si. Jodie was having just a little bit of a hard time with him the first night you were here. I wanted to stay with you all night, but my Dad convinced me to go home and be with him" I said looking at her, reaching out and running my thumb over her cheek not being able to fight the urge to be able to feel her warm skin against my own. "We took a bath, watched a movie, and I ended up singing him to sleep. He still likes Circles baby, he asked me to sing it to him just like I used too" she smiled up at me warmly as she listened to me tell her about my night with Trevor. "He tried to convince me to let him eat ice cream after he brushed his teeth, but I told him that wasn't a great idea" she laughed beautifully before closing her eyes and wincing in a little bit of pain.

"Si, are you okay?" I asked quickly, removing my hands from her afraid to touch any part of her at that moment to cause her anymore pain. She nodded her head as she reached her hand out to grab for mine. "Do you need anything? I can get the nurse for you" I said, getting ready to get up off the bed to go towards the nurses station to grab someone for her.

She shook her head back and forth slowly, her eyes closing briefly before she fluttered them open again. "I'm okay, I don't want anything because it'll make me go to sleep and I don't want to be away from you again" she said softly, her hand gently squeezing mine.

I reached out and ran my hand gently over the top of her hair, "Si, its okay. If you need something please take it. I am going to be here when you wake up. I am not going anywhere" I said to her, wanting nothing more than for her to be comfortable. Seeing her in pain was breaking my heart, and knowing that she was in here because of me crumbled it to the ground.

"In a few minutes, let me enjoy some more time with you first, please?" she asked me, her eyes turning into large saucers as she looked at me with the cutest puppy dog face I have ever seen.

I laughed quietly to myself before reaching out and tapping the tip of her nose, causing her to smile and scrunch her face up slightly. "You are so adorable you know that?" I said smiling.

"Even with the bandages, the cuts, and the tubes?" she asked making a disgusted face as she was describing everything that was hanging out of her. I shook my head back and forth slowly, picking her hand up in mine as I placed my lips softly on the back of her knuckles.

"Si, I fell in love with you when you had cuts, bandages and bruises. I thought you were one of the most beautiful girls that I have ever seen. So yes, even with the bandages, cuts and tubes. You are always going to be the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, no matter what"

She smiled lovingly up at me, her thumb moving over the top of the bear tattooed on my hand, not needing to say a word as the look on her face pretty much said it all for her. We sat quietly for a while, the noise of the TV in the background and the beeping of the machines the only sounds in the room as we couldn't seem to break our stare with each other. After several minutes I saw her shift in the bed, a look of pain on her face making me wish that she would just give in and let the nurses give her some pain medicine. "Can you help me sit up just a little?" she said.