I'm No Good At Goodbyes

Chapter 2

**1 year ago**

Sierra's POV

"Sierra, wait where are you going?" he asked as I carried my suitcase out to my 2015 Ford Escape.

"Austin, I'm sorry but I need to leave" I said swallowing the lump in my throat and trying to hold back the tears that were in my eyes.

"But what about us, what about Trev?" he asked grabbing my hand and pulling me in closer to him.

"What we had was great, I've never had anything like it before, but I just don't think this is the life for Trevor and I" I said.

"How could you even say that SiSi? I love you so much and I would do anything for you and Trevor. You and him are my world now" he said.

I connected my eyes up to his and pulled them away quickly. The amount of sadness that was flowing out them was too much for me to take.

"I'm sorry ocean eyes but I need to do what I think is best," I said pulling away from him and heading towards the living room to get Trev.

"Hi Mommy!" he said excitedly running over to me.

"Hi buddy" I said sitting down on the side of the sofa.

"Where Ausin?" he asked throwing his little hands out in a curious motion.

"Right here buddy" he said as he walked in and grabbed Trevor up into his arms.

"Trucks?" Trevor said looking at him.

"Maybe tomorrow okay buddy? You need to go with Mommy right now" he said his voice shaking.

"No, stay" he said, wrapping his arms around Austin's neck.

It was all I could do to not break down into tears right here at Trevor's actions.

"I'm sorry buddy, but you have to go with Mommy" he said a tear falling out of his eye as he placed a kiss on Trevor's head before setting him in my lap.

I stood up, Trevor resting comfortably on my hip, and leaned in sweetly connecting my lips with his for the last time, his arm wrapping around my waist, a warm tear falling on my cheek.

"Bye Austin and thank you so much. I love you" I said as I turned around leaving the only comfort I knew.

**Present Day**

I remembered the day I left him like it was yesterday even though it was a year ago. I was so unkind to him in many ways that day. I never gave him answers, I never gave him closure. I just threw my bags in my car and told him that I had to leave. It wasn't entirely a lie, his lifestyle really wasn't the most ideal to raise an infant in, but he did try really hard to keep it away from Trev.

I moved in with Austin when Trevor was a year and a half and I left just after he turned two. Austin was Trevor's world and he really was the best Father Figure I could ask for. Whatever Trevor wanted Austin did. He could've been in the middle of writing a song with Lou and Trevor would ask him to go for a walk and he would drop everything to go with him.

He was also a great guy to me. Every free moment he had he was with me whether it was helping me cook dinner, re-watching our favorite horror movie for the tenth time or cuddling on his patio watching the sunrise....he always tried to make time for me. I appreciated it so much, I really did. So why did I leave? I felt like I was holding him back, like I was stopping him from being him, and I couldn't bare to live with that. So I packed my bags and left and I have regretted it every day since.