best of me | woosan (✓)

- fourty one -

tw / mention of death (not main character)

a few days had passed and seonghwa had finally started to leave the hospital for a couple of hours each day to go back to the dorms and take some time for himself. the first day, san had gone with seonghwa and the two had a long discussion about hongjoong and how they could best support him in recovery. wooyoung was happy to stay and keep hongjoong company, and the two of them had a heart to heart about their relationships. now that things were beginning to settle down and feel almost normal again, wooyoung and san were beginning to look for an apartment in the area. both boys were very excited for their new adventure, and even more excited to share the news with their friends.

"ready to go, sannie?" wooyoung asked, walking up to where san was fixing his belt.

"yeah... yeah, i am," san answered, his voice wavering slightly.

"are you sure? you don't sound like it... what's wrong?"

"just a bit anxious, that's all... this is our first apartment showing ever, what if everything goes the wrong way?"

"everything will be just fine, yeah? i'll be right there with you, you don't have to worry."

"but—"

"hey, san.. take a deep breath with me, it's okay..."

wooyoung guided the older boy in taking a few slow deep breaths, holding his hands gently.

"there you go... that's it, love.."

"thank you," san breathed out.

"did you take your meds today? you haven't gotten this anxious in a while..."

"i-i ran out... a-and i can't call my therapist without breaking down so i-i have to wait until i see him next to get a refill."

"no, no... you're not waiting, yeah? i'll help you call, you need your prescription filled sooner than that. give me your phone, babes..."

"you're sure?"

"of course i'm sure, sannie. c'mon, give me your phone now, i'll call."

san nodded and handed wooyoung his phone, then sat down on the bed, trying to calm down a bit. wooyoung sat beside him and rested a hand on his knee while he called.

san listened intently to wooyoung's voice as he spoke with the receptionist, and shortly after wooyoung moved the phone from his ear and held it to his chest.

"would you be able to answer a couple questions for them? i'll be right here making sure you're okay, they just have to ask some questions that i can't answer..."

"o-okay..."

wooyoung handed san the phone and immediately grabbed the boy's free hand, playing with his fingers to help distract him from the anxiety bubbling up in his chest. after he had finished answering the questions, san shoved the phone towards wooyoung and stood up, beginning to pace back and forth. worried, wooyoung quickly finished up the call and then stood in front of san, gently taking his hands.

"i'll call the realtor and reschedule, love... i can't let you out of the house feeling like this, too many bad things could happen and i don't want that for you."

"i'm s-sorry..."

"don't be sorry, it's okay... you're okay, san. i can't go alone when it's for our home, and there's no way i'm going to put you in a position that could negatively affect your health and stability."

"i'm still—"

"shh... don't apologize, yeah? if i was upset over it you would know, but i'm not. i'll never be upset with you when your anxiety keeps us from doing something, because i want you comfortable. maybe i'll be a little disappointed, depending on what it is, but never upset. and i'll only ever be disappointed for my own selfish reasons. never disappointed in you."