best of me | woosan (✓)

- eighty -

tw / mentions of self harm

"are you sure they'll say yes?" hongjoong asked nervously, gripping tightly onto seonghwa's hand as they made their way up the stairs to the apartment.

"why wouldn't they? didn't woo say he was excited for things to settle down so we could go on double dates?"

"b-but... woo's still not used to sangie and jongho rooming together, what if he gets mad at us for asking?"

"baby... don't worry, okay? he's not gonna get mad, yeah?" seonghwa insisted, pulling hongjoong into a hug.

hongjoong closed his eyes and nodded, relaxing as he rested his head on seonghwa's chest and began to listen to his steady heartbeat.

"we don't have to go in right now if you don't want to, love. if you need time before we head in and ask them, it's okay."

hongjoong sighed a bit, frustrated with himself for getting so worked up over asking such a simple question. he pulled himself out of seonghwa's arms and hugged himself, trying to avoid breaking down or lashing out.

"joongie... hey, talk to me..." seonghwa muttered softly, gently trying to intertwine the two's fingers.

hongjoong pulled away quickly, beginning to chew his lip.

"baby..."

"d-don't..."

seonghwa sighed, frowning slightly. he knew hongjoong was getting in his head, and whenever this happened, he pushed seonghwa away. seonghwa was afraid that hongjoong would fall into old habits to say the least.

"at least come inside? for me?"

hongjoong let his eyes cloud with tears, then nodded and followed seonghwa inside.

"hey guys! we were just about to make dinner, do you want to—"

hongjoong stormed past wooyoung and went to his room, slamming the door shut behind him. seonghwa sighed, running his fingers through his hair before looking at wooyoung.

"i'm sorry... he's getting in his head again. i'm lucky i even got him to come inside..."

"it's okay, hwa. neither of you should apologize, it's not either of your faults."

"we were going to ask you and san if you guys wanted to go on a double date tomorrow, but i'm not sure if joong's gonna be up for it anymore..."

"if he is, tell him we'd love to go, yeah?"

seonghwa nodded and thanked wooyoung, then quietly walked to his room and knocked on the door.

"hey, baby? can i come in?" seonghwa asked softly.

"n-no..." hongjoong cried, immediately worrying seonghwa.

"baby... please... please just let me in..."

"w-why...?"

"let me hold you. you don't have to tell me what's wrong, you don't have to talk to me if you don't want to. just let me hold you and comfort you the best i can, yeah?"

"y-you're going to hate me..."

"i could never hate you, joongie. i promise, i won't."

"b-but..."

"i'm coming in. okay?"

"n-no!"

"hongjoong, stop scaring me! just let me come in, i just want you in my arms, okay?" seonghwa yelled, tears filling his eyes.

"s-see? i-i upset you... y-you're going to hate me..."

"s-stop it... stop saying that! i-i love you, i love you so much, baby... i-i'm just scared..." seonghwa cried, trying his hardest to keep himself together.