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76- Missions

The topic at hand was more pressing, more important than me and way more important than Remus.

It was even more important than Blaise.

There was a child, a mixed race child being raised in a house full of vile, racist, evil to the core people. Merlin, I would go to Azkaban, they could take me and lock away the key if they wanted to, I would kidnap that child if it came to it, but I wouldn't rest. Blaise, if he knew about this.. he would go mad, he would go insane if he.. god knows what they could have done to that child. I didn't want to think about it, all I wanted was to make sure that it was safe, with me or Draco or Theo or Pansy or even fucking Adrian if need be but anyone was better than them.

Because Blaise was in no state right now to deal with this yet. He needed to know, yes, this could not be kept from him but he would be absolutely no help with any of this yet. Not until he was better. Not until he was sober.

"What do we do about this all?"

"I don't know Theo, but I feel sick just sitting around waiting, this has been going on for two years.. I just don't want to im.."

"Merlin, I don't want to think of it." He said sighing, squeezing his eyes shut and I leant into his side.

"Go back to Italy if you want, sort things out on that end, I can handle things on this side." I offered gently because I could see how stressed he was getting.

"I can't just leave and dump this all on you. Blaise is my mate too."

"If you knew the things Blaise has done for me.. this isn't dumping anything on me. I'm repaying the favour. I will fix this for him, however long.. whatever it takes, I'll get it done."

"I'm not underestimating you, I just.. how will you even get a hold of the kid? We don't know the name, where they live, what they look like, Merlin we don't even know if it's a boy or a girl."

"I'll get Amir, I'll force him, I'll beg, I'll plead, I'll do whatever. If he has to kidnap that kid, so be it, I'll go to Azkaban, I don't care Theo, wholeheartedly, Blaise needs to be with his kid."

He nodded in understanding, but sighed deeply and I offered him a look of sympathy.

"I just.. I feel like.. what if something happens to you? Then what? Where will that leave me?"

"Nothing will happen to me."

"But what if it does?"

"It won't."

"But where will it leave.. me?" He repeated, harsher. Well maybe not harsher, but firm, with emphasis on the me, and he looked at me, as if he knew something.

"What do you mean?"

"They say.. when you have a gut feeling.. it's right. You've not said I love you back, I don't.. I never want to force you but.. maybe it's London, maybe coming back was a mistake, but I can't shake the feeling that no matter what I do I'll never be enough, I'll never be h.."

"I saw him in a cafe Theo, nothing happened. It was a coincidence, I.. nothing will ever come of it again.. I'm sorry that you feel li.."

"Why would you go to Camden then?"

"I don't know."