Sam and max stories

wet painters

(art by me) 

A slow day at Stinky's diner.

"Hey gs, check this out!" Max says. "Two ordinary fudgie freezes.." he pulls them from behind his back. "But, when expertly tossed with the skill of a champ..." he tosses them on the floor so they slide away. "They become..."

Sam lands on them, using them like skates. "A one way ticket to pain!" he says, crashing into a wall.

The impact causes one of the window frames in grandpa Stinky's office to fall off and smash on the ground. "Huh!?" grandpa looks up from his desk.

"Heave ho!" Max yells as he rides on Sam's shoulders into another wall.

"What the devilfish is going on out here?!" grandpa says as he opens the door and looks at Sam and Max, who had crashed into a table riding a mop bucket. "Time is money! And if you boys are wasting time, then you're wasting MONEY!" he walks over and pokes Max's chest "And that's just sick!" "but we were performing a ritual to attract customers!" Max says. "And the only way for the ritual to work is for us to get hurt!" He looks at the ground. "Real bad..." "what stupid showerhead told you that?" grandpa asks.

Girl stinky nervously giggles and hides behind her gossip magazine.

Grandpa puts his arms around Sam and Max's shoulders. "Listen, instead of killing yourselves, I've got something really important that you can do for me."

*Screen wipe*

Grandpa stinky takes Sam and Max to his apartment.

"Now, are you two ready for your super..." grandpa says.

Sam and Max's eyes shine. "Super?"

"Special..." grandpa says

They get excited "Special!?"

Grandpa puts a finger to his lips. "Secret..."

Sam and Max's faces shrink. "Secret?"

"ASSIGNMENT!?" grandpa yells enthusiastically.

Sam and Max yell and shake with excitement, their eyes almost exploding.

"The two of you are to paint the inside of me apartment!" grandpa says, opening the door.

"YAY!" Sam and Max yell, jumping up in the air.

"BUT!" grandpa says, interrupting. "Let me give you two a warning!" he holds up two cans of white blue shade #ecf5fb paint. "This here paint, is ABSOLUTELY permanent." he hands them the paint cans. "It will NEVER come off."

"So If I see even ONE drop, on ANYTHING but wall," grandpa says, menacingly walking closer. Sam and Max hold hands, shaking and backing up. "I'll have both yer tongues cut out and mounted over me fireplace!" he says, holding up two plaques with their names already engraved into them.

"So, have fun with the job!" grandpa says jollily before closing the door with them inside.

Sam and Max turn around. "Sam..?" Max says. "Yeah, max?" Sam replies. Max looks around. "Grandpa stinky sure has a lot of expensive treasures to drip paint on..." he sets his paint can down. "Do you think we should take this stuff off the walls?" Sam sets his paint can down and points at max. "No way! We're not getting paid to move stuff!" "we're not getting paid at all, sam." Sam crosses his arms and turns away. "That's what I said! We're not getting paid, and that's final." max looks away. "Okay, we'll just paint around this stuff." Sam humphs. "Fine, just don't pay me."

Max smiles. "First we need to set out the tarp!" he says, grabbing one end of it. "Tarp ahoy!" Sam says as he grabs the other end.

They spread the tarp out, Buuut it was only about the size of a handkerchief.