Sam and max stories

The best meal Sam has ever had

It was a normal day on straight street, Max and Sam were visiting Sybil in her office for no particular reason, just for fun. Sam was sitting on the couch, talking with her, while Max was playing with the newton's cradle.

"So Sam, I have a question." Sybil says. Sam looks at her. "Yeah?" Sybil smiles. "I remember one time you guys were in here, I had the song "what's new pussycat" by tom jones playing on the radio." she giggles. "As soon as you heard the song, you laughed a lot." Sam smiles. "Oh yeah, I remember that, Max punched out the radio."

Max looks over. "Only I'm allowed to crack you up." he says with a signature grin. Sam laughs. "And you always do."

Sybil continues. "Anyway, I was wondering, why is that particular song so funny to you?" Sam smiles. "Well, it has to do with the best meal I ever had."

He looks up. "I guess it all began back when Max and I were kids." he begins.

*flashback*

It was just another Friday night and 11 year old Sam was headed to Stinky's diner to meet Max. He was very excited, because Max said that the diner recently had a "new addition", and he couldn't wait to see what it was.

"Sammy!"

Speak of the little devil.

Sam smiled, "hi!" he said as he walked up to Max, who had been waiting. "Finally, you're here!" Max says. "I've been waiting for you for like 5 hours!" Sam giggles, "Sorry, I had to finish my homework!" Max rolls his eyes. "Homework shmomework. C'mon!" He takes Sam's hand and leads him in. Sam blushes a bit, but follows.

When they go in, Max squeals. "There it is!" he says, pointing to the other side of the diner. Sam looks.

There was a brand new and shiny jukebox.

Sam's eyes went wide. "Oh wow!" Max nods. "I know! Isn't it epic?" Sam nods. "yea!" They both walk over to it. It had a sign that said "3 songs for $1:00". Max looks at Sam and asks, "How much spare change have you got?" Sam reaches into his pocket and pulls out some leftover coins, counting them. "Uh, about 3:50." Max smiles, pulling his spare change out too. "Awesome! I have about as much, so that means we can play..." he did some quick multiplication in his head. "21 songs!" Sam smiles. "Wow, we're basically loaded!"

They put their coins in the machine and started looking through the songs. "Hmm, come on Eileen, I love rock and roll, I wanna dance with somebody..." Sam reads. "Hmm, lots of good choices."

Then Max gets an idea.

He giggles. "Hey Sam, what about we play a prank on everyone in here and just play one song 21 times?" he whispers. Sam thinks, then giggles too. "Hehe, ok!"

He looks back to the jukebox. "But which one to choose?" He reads more titles. "Material girl, say you say me, hands to heaven..." he keeps scrolling.

But then Max grabs his arm. "Wait wait go back!" Sam blushes again, but nods, scrolling back up until Max points at a song. "That's the one!"

It was Tom Jones's hit, what's new pussycat.

Sam's eyes go wide. "A-are you sure?" Max nods, smiling with soft eyes. Sam smiles back. "Ok." he says as he starts to push the button.

After they were finished picking the songs, they ordered their food and waited, sitting on the stools at the bar.

The song played over and over again, and Tom's velvety voice continued to fill the diner.

Around the 4th time it played, the two noticed that some people seemed to get wind of what was going on.

In particular, he noticed a woman sitting at one of the booths with her three kids, who were babbling and jumping around. Her hand was shaking, and she looked like she just got her thirty day chip from anger management class.

The 4th play faded out, and It was dead quiet.

And then, when the 5th "what's new pussycat" started playing, she yelled "GOD EFFING DAMMIT!" And pounded her fist on the table, causing silverware to fly off and land on the floor.

It was SUPER hard for Sam and Max not to laugh their heads off.

It went on like that for a little while longer, Sam and Max savoring the reactions of the diner patrons as they shared their oyster fries.

But then as the 7th play faded out, Sam remembered that, when they were punching in the what's new pussycats at the jukebox, Max, being a little genius, had asked him to put in one "it's not unusual."

And that was when the afternoon went from good to great.

After 7 "what's new pussycats" in a row, suddenly, the opening of it's not unusual started to play, and everyone in the diner had a collective sigh of relief. The lady in the booth even went. "Oh thank god! Praise be!" like It was the liberation of france.

Sam and Max still managed to keep their composure, only giggling at the scene.

And on the other hand, when it went back.

Holy crap.

It's not unusual faded out.

It was dead quiet.

And then the opening to what's new pussycat played once again, and everyone lost their minds. There were plates thrown, tables flipped, and the booth lady just up and jumped straight out the window.

Max and Sam couldn't control their laughter anymore, and just burst out howling. Max even laughed so hard he fell off his stool.

And they were surrounded by seemingly indifferent waitresses, once of which mumbled, "yep, same crap as always..." while picking Max up and putting him back on his stool.

And then from the dark corner of the diner, one raggedy looking hobo stood up, and went "now you know." with a smile. "Now you know what it's like to live in my brain."

They unplugged the jukebox after 11 plays of what's new pussycat.

*end flashback*

"And that was the best meal I ever had." Sam says, finishing.

Max and Sybil laugh a lot.

"Oh man, I remember that!" Max says. "I remember the booth lady tried to sue us!" Sam nods. "Yep. What a fun lesson in legal drama that was."

Sybil smiles. "Well I guess that explains it." Sam laughs too. "Yeah, that was a funny memory."

Sybil looks to sam. "You got any more stories like that?" Sam nods. "Oh yeah, I've got plenty! And I'd be happy to share." he then nervously giggles..

"Just.... NOT the one about Xanax."