A Piece of You

𝘊𝘏𝘈𝘗𝘛𝘌𝘙 𝘍𝘖𝘙𝘛𝘠-𝘚𝘐𝘟

𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑅𝐷 𝑃𝐸𝑅𝑆𝑂𝑁 𝑃𝑂𝑉

     "You have to get up. You can't stay like this. This... This isn't you." Uraume frowns at seeing Megumi like this. Since Sukuna brought him here four days ago he has done nothing except obediently stay in bed. He barely moves, he hardly speaks, and his expression is dejected with dull green eyes. "Megumi, why do you let Sukuna do this to you? Stand up for yourself." Uraume pleads, holding Megumi's hand to comfort him.

       He pulls the blanket over himself, slipping his hand out of Uraume's hold. He's too drained to fight with Sukuna, he's out of options.

      "Get up, Megumi. You have a son, he needs you. You have family and friends, don't quit. You can't give up. Sukuna needs help, he needs to go on medication. We need to convince him, you can't stand up to him while like this. I can't convince him on my own, I need your help." Uraume doesn't know what to do to help either of them. Uraume refuses to be a bystander and allow both of them to fall apart.

     Megumi doesn't deserve Yuuta, he doesn't deserve a loving mother-in-law and that healthy relationship where there is trust and communication instead of accusations, insults, and violence. He closes his eyes, forcing the thoughts of Yuuta away. Thinking of what could have been will only make his suffering worsen.

      "Your child needs you—!"

      "He's better off without me." Megumi's voice is barely above a whisper, hoarse and weak.

      "That's not true. You don't mean that."

      Sukuna enters the room, giving Uraume a questioning look. Uraume clenches his jaw, standing up angrily. "Look at what you've done. You ruined him!"

       "Get out, Uraume. My relationship isn't your concern." Sukuna demands. Uraume storms out, slamming the door behind him. Sukuna locks the door, letting out a heavy sigh. Truthfully, Sukuna doesn't know what's wrong with Megumi. Other than bringing him here after their fight, Megumi completely shut down all on his own. Sukuna gets onto the bed, pulling the blanket down.

     "Blessing, look at me." Sukuna whispers, gently grabbing Megumi's bruised jaw. He doesn't look at Sukuna, his eyes watering and Sukuna feels weak all over again. "What can I do? I'm sorry I hurt you, I regret it."

     "I'm just tired, Sukuna."

     "We can go somewhere. Anywhere." Sukuna suggests, just like he used to do all those years ago. 

      "I just want to lay here." He mumbles, turning onto his side. Sukuna wraps his arms around Megumi, holding the smaller male closely. Sukuna is incapable of fixing whatever is wrong, he doesn't know how to make Megumi feel better. "You used to love me." Megumi whimpers, his body trembling as tears roll down his face.

       "I do love you."

       "You used to love me like I was special. Now you're just cruel to me. I didn't deserve that... during that time, you were the most important person in my life. I was willing to give you everything, I just wanted to be loved. You knew how hard it was for me growing up, how suffocated I felt. Why did you cage me up too?"

      "I'm selfish. I want you to live and breathe for me, I want your devotion. I want you with me at all times, I want to know everything about you, even to minor thoughts in your head. I want to keep you..."

      "I tried to kill myself more than once." Megumi confesses, feeling Sukuna tense behind him. "I was so miserable without you that I wanted to die but I was only miserable because of everything you had done. I know it's not just you... I'm not saying it's completely your fault..."

      "My parents loved one another this way. They would scream and fight, abuse me, have shameless sex wherever, act like they were in love, and the cycle continued. I didn't want to be like them, I hate them... but I turned out this way. I want to hurt you, I hate that I want to hurt you but I also don't want you injured because of me. Emotions are too fucking complicated. I love you, I don't want anyone near you. I want to keep you here, right here where I can see, feel, talk, and fuck you. I don't want anyone to see you, I want to keep you exclusively as mine."

     "Being loved by you is like torture." Megumi murmurs before falling asleep. Sukuna can't blame Megumi for feeling that way, Sukuna is an extremely difficult person. He acknowledged that in his therapy sessions. All the people he slept with before he met Megumi, he treated them as less than humans. Just holes for him to use and throw away after using once, disregarding their feelings and not giving a single care about what their names were. He's hurt so many people he's crossed paths with and he still doesn't regret it.

       Sukuna wishes he could love Megumi in a way that isn't similar to his parents or the relationships he's seen around him. He wants that sappy shit too, of course he does. To be able to go about his day without stressing about Megumi sounds too good to be true. To be able to see Megumi spending time with his friends and not be overcome with excessive jealousy also sounds way too good to be true. If he could mark his claim onto Megumi as a way to tell others to back off, he would. He's considered the possibility that the reason he loves bruises on Megumi's skin so much is because in an amoral way, it's like marking claim. 

     "I'm sorry, i'm so sorry." Sukuna murmurs, hugging Megumi even tighter. "I can fix this, I promise. Don't give up on me, don't leave me, please don't leave me." Sukuna's voice cracks and he's trembling, he's that small child all over again not wanting to be left behind and swallowed up by the darkness. He had once accepted he'd forever remain alone without anyone to be there for him. He thinks that he loved his father once and the man let Sukuna be hurt, he didn't care even when Sukuna would cling to him and beg him not to leave or when he'd cry and call for his father to save him and take the pain away. Now, as an adult, he's clinging to Megumi and begging for him not to betray him the way his father did. He can't be left behind, he's strong enough to force Megumi to stay but why does it still feel like there is a hole where his heart should be?