Bed of Nails

Chapter 185

“I want to know what happened that day.” 

So many emotions flashed on his face when I mentioned that day. The day I saw him for the last time before losing consciousness. That day I did not only lose my baby but him too. He was my everything, and in split seconds, my whole life shattered in front of my eyes. The mere reminiscence of that day brings a heaviness to my chest. An unbearable heaviness. I saw the same heaviness in his eyes when I asked him to tell me everything about that day. I could see in his blue eyes that it was difficult for him too. His hand was still resting on my stomach, and it made me hold it more firmly. 

“Please, Erick. I want to know what happened that day after I lost consciousness,” I said in my heavy voice while looking into his blue eyes. He took a sharp breath and tried to take his hand away. He moved his head, not wanting to tell me. I held his hand firmly before he could move it away. 

“Please, I want to know the truth. I want to know why you are worried about my life. I want to know why I lost my baby last time. I want to know why you signed those abortion papers. I want to know everything, and only you can tell me," I said with tears in my eyes, and my breath had turned heavy with so many overwhelming emotions. 

“I deserve to know the truth,” I said, looking straight into his blue eyes. I could see a storm in them when I finally asked him the things that were eating me from inside. All these unanswered questions were making me hollow from the inside. He took a jagged breath when I said that. I could see all the pain in his eyes, which he had been hiding in them for years. He took a few more breaths. I could see he was mustering his courage. As much as it was difficult for me, it was for him too. He, too, lost his baby and me on that day. 

“Please,” I whispered pleadingly while looking into his blue eyes. He nodded his head as if telling me he was ready to tell me the story. 

“That day, I returned from my part-time job. I called you, but you were not answering me. So I checked the whole house, but you were still not there. I was going crazy because I couldn't find you anywhere. You told me you would be waiting for me, but you were nowhere. A bad feeling started to grip my heart, and I knew something was not right. I was scared, so I ran out of the house while trying to call you. You were not picking up the call, but I heard your cell phone ring, and it was coming from the staircase. I immediately ran to, and my whole body went numb,” he said and then stopped. I could feel his body once again going numb as if he could see that day once again repeating in front of his eyes. His breath heaved, and his chest became tight once again at the mere reminiscence of that day. I held his hand firmly when I saw him getting lost in the past. Reminding him that I was here with him. He took a deep breath while looking at me. His blue eyes moved all over my face. 

“I—I found you lying on the stairs, and there was blood all over your legs,” he said while looking into my eyes, and I could feel he was feeling uneasy to tell me what he saw even after so many years. That day had affected him equally. I took a deep breath. I don't even remember how I ended up at the staircase. I only remember that I was feeling a sharp pain in my stomach, and it was becoming out of control. I was feeling so restless and in so much pain that I didn't know what I was doing. I can feel that pain even now. I took a deep, jagged breath. His blue eyes once again moved all over my face, and they softened as if he knew what I was thinking. 

“I got so scared looking at you that my whole body was shaking and my brain stopped processing. After that, my body reacted on its own. I called for an ambulance, but it was taking too long to come, so I picked you up in my arms and ran out of the building. It felt like my body was in survival mode after looking at you like that. I ran inside the hospital with you in my arms. I tried to wake you up, but you were not responding to me. The nurse came running when they saw me. I kept shouting, asking for you to open your eyes, but you were not responding to me. You have no idea how I was feeling at that moment. He said with a jagged breath while looking at me. I could see the pain in his blue eyes, and he was not hiding it from me anymore. 

“It felt like my life was slipping from my fingers. I was trying so hard to hold it, but it kept slipping out of my fingers. The more tightly I held it, the faster it slipped," he said in a heavy voice. I could feel his pain in every word. He had seen his mother losing her life in front of his eyes, and now he was seeing me in the same position. I can't even imagine what he must be going through. 

“I placed you on the bed, and the nurse started to push me out of the emergency room. I kept on shouting your name and begging you to open your eyes. I refused to go out while grabbing the side bed. For only a split second, you open your eyes and hope blooms in my eyes. The first thing you asked me after opening your eyes was to save the baby. I felt so helpless when you begged me to save it. It was the last thing you said before slipping back into unconsciousness. The nurse managed to push me out. I kept standing at the door praying for you both, but my prayers never reached God. He always makes things difficult for me,” he said in the same heavy voice, and a lone tear slipped from his eyes. At this point, I didn't realize I was crying, too. My heart heaved even more when he said. 

“Your dad arrived, and even my last bit of hope shattered.” 

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