Married UNHAPPILY Ever After °[KathNiel] ✓COMPLETE

Chapter 26: Too pained, too Broken

Dillenna Heera's Point of View:

Feeling ko hindi na ako makahinga sa sobrang sikip ng dibdib ko nang maramdaman ko ang mga kamay niyang nakayakap sa'kin. Kahit gaano kasakit ng ginawa niya, ni kahit na katiting ay walang nagbago sa nararamdaman ko sa kanya. It even got worse. While I hated him, I loved him even more. My tears fell as my arms are hanging sluggishly, letting him hug me without protest.

"Theon, maawa ka sa'kin. Tigilan mo na ako. Please."mahinang pagmamakaawa ko.

Ang sakit na kasi. Sobrang sakit na. Nahihirapan akong pigilan ang tunay na nararamdaman ko.

"Dillenna. I'm sorry. Please, listen to me. Kahit ngayon lang, stop seeing them."tugon niya na nagpainis sa'kin.

"Please. Babygirl..."he muttered, making my heart growl both in pain and anger.

"Pwede ba? Wag mo na akong pakialaman! Theon, paulit-ulit mo 'kong pinapatay sa ginagawa mo eh!"singhal ko sa kanya in between my sobs.

He let go of me and I headed to the door. This time, hindi na ako umasa. Hindi ko na hinangad na pigilan niya ako. Gusto kong gisingin ang sarili ko sa katotohanang hinding-hindi ko na dapat siya tanggapin ulit sa buhay ko. Ikakasal na siya three days from now.

Out of my contemplation, he grabbed me and snaked his arms around my waist. Without uttering anything, he kissed me. Right that moment, kahit gusto kong magprotesta ay hindi ko ginawa. But I didn't kiss him back. Umiiyak lang ako habang hinahayaan siya.

"Why did you stop? Pagod ka na? Tapos ka na? Theon, bakit ba ang selfish mo? Hindi ka ba nag-iisip na sa ginagawa mo, lalo mo lang akong pinahihirapan? Theon, mahal na mahal kita. And if I go on loving you, it will kill me."I paused and sobbed. "Parang awa niyo na, pabayaan niyo na ako."

With his streaming-with-tears eyes pierced to me, he didn't say a word. Umiiyak lang siya habang tinitigan niya ako. And while he did it, I felt more of the throbbing pain. The unspoken words hit far deeper that the said ones.

Sa ganoong ayos ko siya iniwan.

I wasn't over yet about my encounter with Amity yesterday, now here he is making everything more painful and even harder for me. Pare-pareho lang sila eh. Ano ba'ng gusto nila? Hindi na nila kailangang ipaalam sa'kin personally because news have wings. Whether I like it or not, it will just come to me. Ikakasal na sila, magiging isang buong pamilya na sila. Samantalang kami ng magiging anak ko...we'll be alone by ourselves.

"D!"I heard Liam's voice yelling as I groped my chest.

It's constricting—I can hardly breathe. Kumapa ako ng kahit ano na pwedeng hawakan but he already enveloped me in his arms.

"Baby! D, just keep breathing. Alright? Baby, I'm here. I'm here."he panicked.

***

Liam's Point of View:

Papunta na ako sa classroom para sunduin si Amity. Tumawag kasi siya na hindi raw pumasok sa klase si Theon. I was at the end of the hallway when I eyed Dillenna groping her chest. Is she crying? Idiot. Of course she is! What else could be the reason why she gets panic attacks? Walang pagdadalawang isip na tumakbo ako papunta sa kanya. Niyakap ko siya agad nang maabutan ko na siya.

"Baby! D, just keep breathing. Alright? Baby, I'm here. I'm here."I muttered in an edgy voice.

I felt something cold gushing in my heart when I felt her hands hugging me back.

"Liam. Ikakasal na sila."humagulhol siya. "Ikakasal na sila. Alam ko naman na mangyayari 'to... I knew this is going to happen the very moment I left him. But now that it's happening, it still kills me."

Humagulhol siya at tanging nagawa ko lang ay ang yakapin siya ng mahigpit.

"Ibinigay ko ang sarili ko sa kanya ng buo. So as my heart. And when he returned it, it was broken to pieces. Ngayon, I don't know how to mend it. I don't even know if it will ever be fixed again."

Hindi ko na napigilan ang luhang kumawala sa mga mata ko nang marinig pa ang hagulhol niya.

"Liam... Ang sakit. Ang sakit-sakit. Among the billion people, why does it have to be me? Bakit ako?"

"Baby. Calm down please... You're having your panic attacks—"

"Liam. Ba't niya nagawa sa'kin 'yon? Ba't nagawa ni Amity sa'kin yon? Why? Have I not been enough to him? Have I not been a good friend to her?"

"Dillenna. Wala kang kasalanan. Wala kang kasalanan. Okay?"I said to her, cupping her cheeks.

Pinunasan ko ang mga luha niya. Then, I kissed her eyes.

"Why did you do it to me, Liam? Bakit pati ikaw?"umiiyak na tanong niya.

Napahikbi na ako ng tuluyan sa tanong niya. Kinuha ko ang dalawang kamay niya't pinisil 'yon.

"Ito D. Ito ang dahilan kung bakit ko nagawang pagtakpan si Amity. It's seeing you like this. I was only protecting you. I'm sorry. Baby, I'm sorry. I haven't chosen her because I intently want to fool you. I have chosen her because I love you."

Hearing myself say all that, lalong lumakas ang hagulhol niya. Dumidiin ang isang kamay niyang nakahawak sa braso ko.

"I thought that everything was under my control. Aakuin ko naman sana talaga ang bata para huwag kayong magkahiwalay ni Theon. Iyon nga lang... I failed. I failed because what I did in the first place is a mistake. I should have known better. A mistake can't be corrected by committing another mistake."

"I really felt sad. Because after what you all did to me, I have forgotten to be myself. I have forgotten to be happy. I have forgotten to trust people. I don't know if I'm already prepared to forgive you Liam."she said, making my tears fell again.

I nodded. After all that she's been through, she's too pained to forgive. She's too broken to forget. Okay lang D... Ang saya ko na ngayon na nakakausap kita. Narinig ko ang boses mo. Na nandito ka sa tabi ko kahit alam kong ngayon lang 'to.

"For as long as the pain is here, I can't be certain if I still want you back in my life."Dillenna said in a composed tone.

After wiping her tears, she smiled flatly at me.

"Please. 'Wag niyo na akong guluhin. Tulungan niyo 'kong lumimot."mahinang wika niya bago niya ako tuluyang iniwan.

Sorry Liam. I still love you. :D ♥