Mark's Roommate

Mark- I Never Meant You Any Harm

Chapter 44- Mark

I stand on my driveway, head racing, heart pumping and tears pouring down my face. I go back inside to call Kiera from my cell, but I hear her ringtone from her room. Dammit. She has nothing but her car, and it's not like I can call her car or anything. I pace for a long time, trying to think of some way to find her. But she could be anywhere.

I slam my fists down on the wall and a sharp pain shoots through my hands and wrists. I shake my hands out, the pain slightly fading. I go to the couch and call Kiera's friends, asking if they've seen her. I first try Merida.

"Hey, Merida?" I ask when she picks up.

"Kiera...why the hell is your voice so deep?!"

"It's Mark. Hey, have you seen Kiera recently?"

"No..why..? Oh no, she's not missing again is she?! Is she okay."

"It's a long story, but if you see her, call me back okay?"

"Um..okay?"

"Thanks," I say and hang up. I call her other friends, but no one's seen her. I throw my head back against the couch top and let out a groan, anger filling me up. I am such and idiot. I mean, I love her, but I can' continue to be with her...

It's like...I can't be with her, but I really want to be. But she's a good deal younger than me and she's the first girl I've been with in so long, I just...I want to know if it's real love. But, how do I explain that to Kiera? And now especially how do I do it? She's been through so much in her life, so now I feel like a douche for doing this to her. But I also question if she likes me back, or as much as I like her.

I mean, she has a little crush on Aaron, but she claims it's just a fan girl crush...but she had a fan girl crush on me for a long time. So, why does that stop her from secretly liking him more than she let on. I just want her to be happy, and if she really wants to be Aaron or someone else, I don't want to make her unhappy by forcing her to stay with me.

But wouldn't she tell me if she felt this? She's really open with her opinions and feelings, but what if she thought it would hurt me, so she kept quiet? Or what if she was scared to tell me, cause she thought I'd get mad?!

I shake my head and go to the kitchen and grab a beer. I crack it open and sip it for a while. When it's gone, I get another. Then another. Then another. And a few more. After three hours, I'm hammered and I can't keep my head straight, let alone walk to my room. I pass out on my couch a few minutes later.

I wake up the next morning with a throbbing headache. I take some medicine and then call Wade.

"Hey, Mark," he greets.

"Hey.." I mumble, still waking up.

"Jeez, you sound like crap. You okay?" Wade asks me, worry in his voice. I tell him everything that's happened and when I'm done, Wade takes a deep breath.

"So she's pretty much missing again?"

"Yeah, and now, I know she's off who knows where. She's not with any friends and I can't just call her or anything."

"Could she be holding up in the house that Kent had? Possibly?" Wade offers.

"No, I'm pretty sure that house was sold off to an older couple or something after he was arrested."

"Oh, so rule that out. Hotel?"

"No money, couldn't pay for it."

"Living out of her car."

"Maybe, but she had a lot of gas, so she probably drove somewhere."

"Jeez, Kiera..." Wade breaths a heavy sigh... A long silence, "What if she went home?"

"Wade, she's not here."

"No, no, no you nimrod. Home home. Back where she was raised."

"You think she could get that far?"

"Who knows, but maybe." I think about it for a while. It seems legit. I thank Wade and hang up then go to her computer and make a video for her channel. She's bound to see it, so then she'll hear the story full out. I stammer and choke on my own words several times while recording, but when it's done, I upload it and hope for the best.

Kiera, please...forgive me? I never meant to hurt you.