Secret Love Nest

Just Us

Do you also get confuse about different sayings related to love?

Like, before you love someone, learn to love yourself first.

Then follow it with this: If you are loving someone, don't give it all, keep something for yourself. In case it won't work, at least you keep something of yourself to begin with again.

See? Very confusing. Right?

Or am I the only one confuse about it?

This is the debate the Goddess and I had last night. It almost ended our young friendship.

It's ramen night. We try doing this twice a month. Goddes and I will cook authentic, not out of a package or instant, ramen and have dinner together.

Just us. Without Qing. So we usually have ramen night when Qing is out working at night or in location shoot like tonight. (Qing being in Shanghai)

We researched different ramen recipes and try them one by one. Goddess is the main cook of course and I am her cute sous chef.

Anyway, back to our topic.

She was adamant that the second saying is right. You should keep some love for yourself and don't give it all out.

While I say, why keep some love to yourself? The first saying said it, love yourself first before sharing that love to others.

Me: It's a given. I love myself. Why do I have to control myself and don't pour every love I have on my man?

Goddess: So you can retain some love for yourself in case the relationship won't work.

Me: Why think that it won't work? I always go into a relationship thinking that this person is the one.

Goddess: (scoffing) And when it ended? What do you do? You cry and feel devastated that after every efforts you did, you guys didn't work.

Me: Well yeah. I do have that question. Why did we didn't work out? What happened?

Goddess: See?

Me: (nodding) I have questions, that's true. But I think every person who came out of a break up will have questions like that. But I don't have regrets.

Goddess: (arching one eyebrow) You don't have regrets?

Me: Yes! I gave my all. I tried everything. I did all that I can to make that relationship work. If it didn't work, I can confidently say that it's not because of the lack of efforts on my part. Hey, don't blame it on me.

The Goddess gave me a stunned look. Then she laughed.

Goddess: Oh my God. So you make the other party the bad villain?

Me: They are the one who dumped me. And if the break up is a mutual decision, it's because I know I need to let the person go because we are both not happy anymore.

Goddess: (hands on her hips) And when the relationship is over, you just move on.

Me: Yes. Like I said. I gave my all already. I tried everything. It's not my fault anymore if it didn't work.

Goddess: (scoffing) You jerk. You, Sir, are a typical man. Insensitive bastards.

Me: (offended) Hey! We men have feelings too. But what else can I do? I already gave it my best shot!

Goddess: How can you say that you already gave it your best shot when the relationship ended anyway? Giving your best shot means you saved the relattionship.