Secret Love Nest 2018

A "Disaster"

When you just came from a wonderful stint in New York and you will come home to a chaos.

It hasn't been 24 hours since I landed in Beijing from New York when Meng messaged me.

"I think Xiao is dating Lipin. We saw them together the other night having dinner and looking too close."

All my alarm bells rang when I read this message. I ran to Qing to panic in front of him.

Scenario:

Me: (shoving my phone on Qing's face) Read it. Read it! Oh this is a disaster.

Qing: (taking the phone and squinting his eyes on the screen) What is the disaster?

Me: (pointing at the phone) That! That! Xiao is dating Lipin! That is the disaster!

Qing: (calmly) Why is it a disaster?

Me: Why are you calm?! You are frustrating me!

Qing: (still calmly) Why are so hyped? Are you in sugar rush again?

I cannot believe him. I cannot understand why he is so calm about this.

Qing: While I cannot understand why you are jumping around like a drug overdosed monkey. Dayu, I know that monkey is your sign, but you don't have to act like one.

I want to kill him again. This is like the "couch" all over again.

Me: Can't you see the enormity of the problem? Xiao and Lipin are dating!

Qing: Can't you see that you are over reacting? Xiao and Lipin are just dating. They are not married yet.

I snatched my phone from his hand before I explode in frustration from this infuriating jerk.

I glared at him while dialing Meng's number. Meng will understand me. Meng will not think that I am over reacting. Meng and I...we are Xiao's bestfriends.

Qing doesn't know anything! Stupid Wang Qing!

Meng: (answering my call) What should we do?

We don't say hello when we are in an emergency situation. And Xiao dating Lipin is an emergency situation.

Me: First, kidnap Xiao. Put him in a sack. Bundle him up. Make sure the sack has holes so air can pass inside and he can breath. We are just kidnapping him and not killing him. Then take him to a safe house. Wait for me there. I will just look for a priest here that can perform exorcism and...

I stopped talking when Qing took my phone away from me.

Qing: Hello, Meng. Yeah, it's Qing. Stop taking notes. Put the pen down. Whatever Dayu said, forget about it. (Listening) No, I am not suggesting that we should hypnotize Xiao. (Listening again) What the fuck is wrong with the two of you? What is wrong really? So Xiao and Lipin are dating, is that such a big deal? Why?

I tried taking my phone back but Qing jumped on top of the couch and put a hand on top of my head to ward me off. I suddenly feel like Jerry to his Tom when the cat has the mouse where he wants him to be.

Good thing, it's a seldom occurance on those two cartoon characters. Jerry always outwit Tom, everyone knows that.