Ryland,
-'s cat is very cute. Well, all of them are. But I'm talking about Dean right now. I feel like if he was a sound he'd be a mlep. Y'know what I mean?
Ryland was posting pictures of him earlier and I had never before wished so much to be a cat. Not only is he in close proximity to Ryland, but cats don't really have to worry about much, they just kind of exist as they are.
I feel way better since telling Ryland what I did earlier. My friends agreed that his level of understanding and acceptance was basically unprecedented and they were glad it worked out so well for me. It kind of sounds like I cheated, but I want to clarify that I didn't. I just don't want to really talk about it right now. It had been weighing on me for three days nonstop, like a sumo wrestler had taken up permanent residence in my stomach. Even if he had an adverse reaction, I still would be glad to get it off my chest because it was stressing me out so much I really thought I was developing stress ulcers.
Next topic:
Saying "faggot" doesn't make a gay person problematic or bad. I understand if certain gay people don't want to hear the word because it's triggering or they just don't like it, but they shouldn't dictate to the entire community what they should and/or shouldn't do. As long as both parties are respecting each other and not hurting anybody they should be allowed to do as they choose.
I'm so fucking sad I couldn't see Ryland's hair today. He said it was super curly and sweaty and I'm an absolute fucking GOON for his hair. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVELOVELOVE (his) messy curly hair. It's my #1 weakness.
Kai and Jenna are in Bloomington to visit Kai's grandma and the rest of her family right now and I'm so excited for them being nearby. They're coming up Wednesday night and spending the night, then we're going to drive back to Bloomington Thursday night. I'm so excited to see them, it's felt like forever.
That way, too, Ryland's mom doesn't have to buy me a train ticket into town and I feel less weirdly indebted to her. I'm super fucking pumped to spend Saturday with him. I can't wait to play with his hair and cuddle. It's so weird we can't watch Big Brother together anymore.
I hate the idea of Kaden giving Ryland rides, but I know it's way better than him having to wait an hour for his mom, so I understand. Kaden is such a shithead and no doubt a reckless unsafe driver I can't stand him having any semblance of control over Ryland's safety. I just hate Kaden in general too. If you're going to be a dick-- just be a dick; Don't hide it in some poor guise of niceties all the while completely disrespecting someones boundaries and acting like a pure innocent fucking baby.
I'm so excited for Ryland to drive, I know he'll be safe. The roads will be a better place with him on them, I'm just nervous because I don't trust other drivers. Hopefully now that his mom isn't getting a hotel he'll be able to get his car sooner, too.
Whenever Ryland talks about his gym class I'm always upset I can't be there because he always talks about how into it he gets and how he dives for the ball and stuff. I don't think I've ever seen him to strenuous physical activity and it makes me sad. I'd love to someday.
I know this chapter is about half of yours, but I hope it lives up to expectations.
I love you a lot, dude. Please send selfies.
Sincerely,
lvrboy
