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Baby no ones soul is clean. So live a little dirty

 So live a little dirty

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Marriage.

I thought The idea of it was ruined for me the second my father had me bind myself to Satan.

The word wife—got a different meaning.

It didn't mean soulmate and lover, it meant pain and surrender.

The thought of being like that again, made my insides burn and sizzle.

I was never born the tie myself to someone.

Hell, sometimes I think that meeting Lorenzo was not what the fates wanted.

But I did meet him, at the bottom of those stairs.

And the second I did, the fear didn't matter. The bore of my old life, exploded into pieces. The risk of it all? Ignited my skin almost as perfectly as his touch did.

And now, The cold of the rain didn't matter, the pounding of it on my skin was obsolete.

My chest was light, yet heavy.

And my hands that were on him, were numb.

"Marry me." His two words rang like a gong in my head, and although it felt like a year had gone by since he said them I knew it was only a few fractions of desolate seconds.

"Lorenzo-" I said with words not of my own.

"I didn't plan on doing this." He said "I tried to talk myself out of it," he admitted as he moved forward to shelter me from the rain.

What changed? What changed that mind of yours?

"I'd rather risk rejection than let this ring sit in my dresser for another week." He said. How long had it be sitting in the dresser at first? How long have you wanted to me mine in this way?

Rejection.

I could say no, he wanted me to know that I could. If I really wanted to.

"Rejection?" I said aloud to myself. His eyes shifting to graze my face delicately.

Maybe this was it, this was the feeling I'd felt not long ago.

This is what changed inside me.

Maybe I wanted to be his in this way.

"If that's what you want-" he said, as he brought his hand up to brush my face, he didn't look angry or disappointed. He looked so untameably in love with me.

"And do you know what I want?" I said to silence him, as my body forced me closer to him. Maybe because the cold was starting to seep through my clothes; or maybe because I just wanted to be closer to him.

But truly He didn't know. Not this at least, He was as much of a stranger to this as I was.

Because we had the same beginning.

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