Zero Falls: Season One

Will vs Manliness-Part Three

Meanwhile, back at the shack, Mabel and Bill were trying to prepare Stan to ask out Lazy Susan.

"I really don't know about this, kids," Stan insisted. "For the millennia of my life, I only managed to have one soulmate."

"And, what happened to her?" Bill asked.

Stan shrugged awkwardly. "Long story short, she turned into a vicious owl beast and tried to eat my face, so we decided to be friends."

"Somehow, I believe that."

Mabel placed an encouraging hand on her uncle's shoulder. "Don't sweat it, Grunkle Stan, because Bill and I are going to make you irresistible."

"How, exactly?" Bill remarked, gesturing to Stan. "He looks like a grandpa in cosplay, and smells like a deep fried shoe locker."

"I can confirm that is my most accurate description," Stan replied.

Mabel straightened boldly. "Trust me, when I have my heart set on a potential match, ain't nothing gonna stop me," She declared. "Now, let's start with some basic roleplaying. Bill, you be Lazy Susan."

"Thus, the beginning of my nightmare," Bill sighed.

"Now, Stan, show me how you approach a woman," She told him. "And remember, this is a nonjudgmental environment, so I'll just be right on the side judging you on a scale of 1 to 10."

Stan looked towards Bill. He took a deep breath, and said. "Hey there! Wanna see me randomly combust into flames!?"

There was a loud shrill from a whistle that Mabel blew into.

"Where did you get that whistle?" Bill asked.

Mabel didn't answer him, and sighed heavily. "This'll take a lot of work..."

❇❇❇

Back in the Man Cave, the Manotaurs had finally stopped fighting, and faced Will.

"After a lot of punching, we decided to deny your request," Chutzpar told him.

"Denied!" A Manotaur repeated, before punching himself in the face.

Will frowned in disappointment, and tried to think of something. Then, an idea dawned on him. "OK, that's fine, I guess you think it would be too hard to teach me. Maybe, you're not man enough to try."

"Not MAN enough!?" A Manotaur shouted, stomping forward.

"Warrior..." Chutzpar warned.

The Manotaur towered over Will. "NOT MAN ENOUGH!?"

"He didn't mean it," Chutzpar insisted, trying to calm his friend down.

The creature didn't listen, and glared at the boy. "I have three Y chromosomes, six Adam apples, pecs on my abs, and FISTS FOR NIPPLES!"

"It seems to me you're too scared to teach me how to be a man," Will taunted. "Do you hear that? It sounds like...Bock-bock! Bock. Oh, that's really weird--Bocock! BOCAW! Is that--BACAW! It sounds like--BACAW! Yeah, a bunch of chickens!"

The Manotaurs gasp, and huddled together once more. Will caught a snippet of their murmuring, before they broke apart.

"After a second round of deliberation, we have decided to help you become a man!" Chutzpar said.

"Man! Man! Man!" The others chanted.

"Thanks guys! Whatever it is, I won't let you down," Will promised.

A while later, they moved outside the mountain, where they encountered a small hole, which had a sign beside it called Pain Hole.