Covetous

Chapter 76

Bella 

"I-I." Ella stuttered, her eyes wide. She stood still, obviously shocked at the sight.

"Ella, I can explain-"

"I'm sorry for intruding." She said quickly and rushed out the room. I stood up and grabbed my dressing gown, throwing it over me as I rushed out the door.

"Ella wait!"

She turned around, giving me a small smile before walking back so we were just by the door to our dorm (which was now closed). "I am really sorry for interrupting, I didn't think you had any company." She murmured, looking down at her shoes.

"It's alright." I said awkwardly. What am I meant to say? "Can you..um..can you not tell anyone? This whole thing wasn't meant to happen, and it won't again."

"Really? I thought you liked him?"

"What? No I don't."

"Oh. Well, I obviously won't tell anyone, but you might want to sort out whatever...that...was. Theo is our friend, and I don't want you guys to fall out over it."

"We won't, I swear."

"Okay. Well, I'll leave you to it." She smiled and walked away.

I took a big sigh before opening the door again. Theo was basically fully dressed, his tie loosely around his shoulders, his top had a couple of loose buttons, his shoes untied.

"Where are you going?" I asked, watching as he rushed to get changed.

He looked up at me, tears threatening to spill. "So you did think it was a mistake?" He asked and stopped getting changed.

"What? No-"

"You just told Ella that this was never meant to happen, that it won't happen again."

Oh shit.

"So thanks for answering my question. I get it, you just wanted a shag. Well, I hope it was up to your standards, because it won't happen again." He muttered before rushing out the door.

"Wait, no Theo!" I shouted. "Come back!"

He sped walked down the hallway, and I just watched as he went. There's no point in chasing after him, not when I'm dressed in only a dressing gown.

Fuck!

I sighed and slammed my door shut. Why did I say that?

Why was I so stupid to say that it was a mistake. It wasn't a mistake. I liked it, and I'd do it again any day of the week.

I jumped in the shower, mentally scolding myself for being so stupid. So selfish. He told me he liked me, and I threw it in his face. I do what every girl does to him, what all of them did...except Grace.

Fucking Grace. What a bitch. Why did Theo have to fall for such a perfect girl. She was so stunning, so nice. She was caring, she was funny, lovable and a genuinely good friend. She was there for him when he went through some rough times during summer. How am I meant to compete with that?

So he has a little crush on me? That could just be him trying to forget about Grace, he might not mean it. He could be using me, like everyone else does. I-I don't want him to do that.

I cried by myself in the shower, thinking about my feelings. I liked Theo, but I can't get back into another relationship right now. My mind is fucked, it's always been fucked. I overthink everything, which makes me become scared. And I am, I'm scared to be with someone else, because every relationship I get in just blows up in my face.