Never Again: Chapter 37
Iris's POV
My giant paws pounded into the ground, I loved this feeling. The feeling of the wind hitting my face, my claws digging up dirt, and the sun warming my bones, it was amazing.
Rose let out a howl and I joined in. Our howls echoed through the air as we ran. If I said Rose and I didn't have a bond then I would be lying. I had a deeper bond with Rose than anyone else, which is weird, because when Liam was alive, Rose and I still had the deepest bond. I'm not sure why but we had a deep bond even when we were humans. I barked at Rose and then slowed down, i do have to say that Rose was by far the best to run with, we matched pace. We were both faster than Niall and Aden, and our strides matched to a T.
She slowed down and cocked her head sideways. I wanted to see if we could talk in our minds like Aden and I do.
"Rose can you hear me," I asked. She looked startled but nodded her head and I couldn't help but bark and wag my tail in joy. "Just try to talk to me like your human, but don't move your mouth, you have to think about it," I explained to her. She nodded her head.
"Am I doing it?" She asked.
"YES!" I screamed in my mind startling her but I couldn't help but run up and tackle her to the ground. She had a wolfy grin as I jumped up and she chased after me.
After an hour or so running we trotted up to the house. I didn't want to go inside, the last time I was insides I was with Liam. I wander what they did with his stuff.
"Rose what did you do with Liam's stuff," I asked, still I'm wolf form.
"We packed it in boxes, we figured you would want to go through it," she explained. I sat at the bottom of the stairs, not wanting to enter the house. Rose nudged my with her nose and I got up. She was trying to reassure me but all the guilt and sadness that I was avoiding was going to hit me hard, and I mentally and physically wasn't prepared for that.
Rose whined, from behind me but I didn't turn around I just stared at those doors. I needed to face reality sooner or later, I needed to take responsibility for what I had done. I let out a sigh and turned human. Rose did the same.
"Your eyes are red," she commented, I looked up and realized hers were too.
"So are yours," I said a little shocked.
We walked inside, and everyone was talking about a plan of attack, Aden was helping but Niall was glaring out the window, still naked. Niall was still looking out the window, but you could tell he was still pissed, I could feel his anger and hate towards me, but something else made him this way.
"Why did you leave when I told you not too," Niall growled viciously as he faced us, our eyes were back to normal now.
"Because you don't own me and I don't have to listen to you," Rose spat, she was hurting, Niall was acting so cold to her and I could tell she didn't like it.
"What if she hurt you, then we wouldn't have been able to find you!" Niall roared.
"She wouldn't do that," Rose defended.
"WE DIDNT THINK SHE WOULD KILL LIAM BUT SHE DID!!!" Niall screamed. I winced, it hurt, but suddenly everything made sense why he was mad at me , I had a brother, and I killed him. Niall had a brother but someone else killed him. It all made sense in why he wouldn't forgive me. He hated me because I killed my brother, and he was angry at me because he had his brother taken away from him. I was just like Isaac, the wolf that murdered Niall's brother, that's why Niall couldn't stand me. Even though I realized why he hated me, I couldn't tell what else made him so hateful at the moment.
I masked my emotions quickly, not letting anyone see the pain and guilt that so badly wanted out. I forbid my eyes to change color and just stood there staring at Niall, with my normal eyes.
"Do you even care that you killed him, that his last memories of you were your vicious self and your blood red eyes," Niall asked wickedly as he walked closer to me. Everyone's eyes were on me, rose was glaring daggers at Niall. But I just stared at him. "Do you CARE THAT YOU MURDERED SOMEONE!?" He screamed in my face."ANSWER ME," he screamed, his alpha voice commanding me, but it didn't have affect on me, so I kept my mouth shut. Then he slapped me across the face as hard as he could sending me to the ground. Everyone looked shocked, and I knew no one could find the words to say anything. Aden was studying my features, he was looking for the wolf that commanded to be let out. I stood back up, my face completely masked from pain, and anger. "You do what I say!" He growled. "Now answer my question" he spat. I looked at him blankly and he slapped me harder making me fall again.
This wasn't the Niall i remembered, this one was cold and evil and it made my wolf want to rip his fucking face off. I growled viciously at him, but kept my emotions masked. No one thought Niall would have smacked me, I never in a million years would have thought he would smack anyone.
"WHAT THE FUCK NIALL?!" Rose screamed at him.
"I'm alpha! And if this murderer is going to be a part of our pack then she will learn to obey," Niall yelled back. I knew rose's feelings were hurt, because Niall was being so hateful.
"I'm alpha too ,Niall, stop being a jackass!" She spat, and Niall growled viciously at her.
I turned into my wolf form and stormed outside. If I didn't leave I would attack Niall, and that would be bad for everyone. His words were racing in my head I was so beyond angry and sad. The guilt and self hate was eating me alive, and I couldn't mask the pain any longer. I looked at my reflection and my eyes were such a bright red, they were the reddest they have ever been. Aden said that when my eyes turned red it was because of the self hate and guilt, it was like a reminder to me that I was a murderer. I heard Niall storm off upstairs, and I saw everyone looking out the window, they knew it was best to just leave me alone. Aden looked sad, and I herd him explain why my eyes were red again to them, so that they understood.
I took off into the woods, I didn't need their pity, I was a murderer. I ran until I found Liam's grave And then I turned human. Then, unable to hold my tears in, I cried.
I cried for the fact that Niall hated me, for the fact that I hated my self. For the fact that I killed Liam, Liam was dead, and he wasn't ever comin back, I cried for the fact that Rose was hurting, and that Zayn had a broken heart because of me, and finally I just cried because I was broken, and I realised I wasn't happy, because I was a murder.
I knew that if I spent time with rose, then she could help me with my problems, I knew she was my better half. We were best friends for a reason, and she could help heal me in ways that Zayn, or Aden couldn't. The only problem was ... Niall probably wouldn't let the happen, and rose was already really busy trying to plan an attack for the rival pack.
I sighed and i laid over Liam's grave as I turned into wolf form, then I cried my self to sleep, dreaming of better days.
