Kaylor Family One-Shots

All too Well

Taylor's P.O.V

It's taken me nearly five years to get back onstage and even longer for me to put All Too Well back on the set list for a show but as insane as it seems to be to put the one song that I always swore I'd never sing live again. The last time I preformed this song at the Grammys I spent almost half an hour backstage with my make-up artist getting mad at me for crying and messing up my make-up but to be honest I never expected to cry during the performance but this was one that really got me choked up good. The moment that I played the first chord of the song on the piano it hits me, and from the first word of 'I' to the last word 'well' that the song really affects me. I play it back through my mind the first chorus,

"I walked through the door with you, the air was cold,
But something 'bout it felt like home somehow and I
Left my scarf there at your sister's house,
And you still got it in your drawer even now." 

It makes me think about that scarf and how I felt in that moment, the one moment that I felt my relationship was slowly slipping south and that despite how close I felt and how it felt to be moving forward meeting that special someone's family but now that I think about it I can't help but see the faults in that relationship and I see the similarities from life back then to life now. How my 21 year old self was still making mistakes but at the same time now at 32 I'm still making the same mistakes and that is what leads us to right now.

Concert Time...

My nerves were on high and for the first time I felt nervous about performing, it is difficult to think of playing this song and not having the public put their own spin on it. I know exactly who I will be thinking of when I sing this song and as I stand under the stage looking up at the stage just praying that the floor doesn't fall in this time and that maybe one of these days I will actually learn my lesson. As I look around at the stagehands and I catch a glimpse of Tree scurrying around I can't help but think that after all this time, will the song still make me cry. But before I can procrastinate too much longer I get the signal I've been waiting for since I was 26 the chance to perform in front of a live audience again. The piano lifts slowly with me and I start to play the chords I know like the back of my own hand.

"I walked through the door with you, the air was cold,
But something 'bout it felt like home somehow and I
Left my scarf there at your sister's house,
And you still got it in your drawer even now.

Oh, your sweet disposition and my wide-eyed gaze.
We're singing in the car, getting lost upstate.
The Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place,
And I can picture it after all these days.

And I know it's long gone,
And that magic's not here no more,
And I might be okay,
But I'm not fine at all."

Karlie. Her name sticks in my mind and as my mind thinks back to that time when I was 25 and thought that life would forever stay the same, that Karlie and I were destined to forever be the same people. Never changing and never having to admit things publically. I was stupid for thinking that our long road trips upstate into the walking tracks of New York and getting lost for hours. No one knew we took those trips to upstate New York and to be honest no one really even looked for us and it felt wonderful to be able to loose ourselves completely in the surroundings and the beauty of life.

" 'Cause there we are again on that little town street.
You almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over me.
Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well.

Photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turning red.
You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin-size bed
And your mother's telling stories about you on a tee ball team
You tell me 'bout your past, thinking your future was me.

And I know it's long gone
And there was nothing else I could do
And I forget about you long enough
To forget why I needed to"

I can't help but think about the street that we travelled down and I let Karlie drive one of the Lincoln Cadillac's for the first time since we'd been together and in a small little town the one time that I let her drive she actually did run a red light and the more I sing through this song the more I think about the fact that although this song related heavily when I was 21 it still relates now nearly ten years later and although it shocks me it also shows me how I have always lived dating someone who I was destined to be with. At 21 I found Jake and at 25 I found Karlie, the one person who no matter how much fame she got through her modelling she never changed and that was what drew me to her in the first place and now that I reflect back on it I can't help but think about how nice it is to think about her and not burst into the obnoxious tears that I had cried for the first six months after we broke up.

" 'Cause there we are again in the middle of the night.
We dance around the kitchen in the refrigerator light
Down the stairs, I was there, I remember it all too well, yeah.

Maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much,
And maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up.
Running scared, I was there, I remember it all too well.

Hey, you call me up again just to break me like a promise.
So casually cruel in the name of being honest.
I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
'Cause I remember it all, all, all too well."

As my fingers fly over the keys of the piano I think about the time that we danced around her kitchen listening to 1989 for the first time before anyone else had ever heard it and how even as midnight approached and then disappeared we opened the refrigerator light in her kitchen and then walking down into her living room which is three stairs down from the kitchen, the light is warm and the company is awesome so I could never really complain and that is what led me to the main problem that I have now, I'm alone. I'm really alone and although I'm surrounded by my family I'm also aware of the fact that my prime years for having children and I'm still alone and I'm not even close to my dream of having ten kids, so many kids.

"Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it
I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it,
After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own
Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone

But you keep my old scarf from that very first week
'Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me
You can't get rid of it, 'cause you remember it all too well, yeah
'Cause there we are again, when I loved you so
Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

Wind in my hair, you were there, you remember it all
Down the stairs, you were there, you remember it all
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well."

As I polish off the song I can feel the feint tear lines running down my face and as I look across the crowd I can't help but try to smile. My eyes cast over the crowd yelling at me and celebrating with me. I can feel my tear lines drying up and as I then look across to side stage I see a familiar face and shadow and as I lean in to speak into the microphone I hear the crowd roar even louder. I pull out one of my ear pieces and turn around to face them, all I can see is the faces of people laughing, crying, smiling and pointing. I go to turn around but I don't get that far as two long arms wrap around me and I know it's my one true love. Karlie Elizabeth Kloss. I spin around and before I can move or stand up I see Karlie kneel down in front of me, the crowd yells louder, if that's even possible and before I can even say one word Karlie starts to speak. "Taylor Alison Swift, I love you more than life itself and although we've had our times of trouble, we've had our times of love and I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you, that is if you'll have me." My mouth drops open and I nod but Karlie quickly speaks, "oh no wait until I ask you the question." I look at her and smile as the crowd laughs, "Taylor will you marry me?" Karlie questions and I'm quick to reply with a nod and a "yes, I love you too." Karlie sweeps me into her arms and swings me around before latching my newest accessory onto my third finger of my left hand. As I turn back to the crowd I smile at them. "Wow, I guess you all got more than you bargained for when you walked in here tonight, I was going to introduce you to my girlfriend Karlie Kloss but I hear that you know something more than I do so Atlanta, Georgia please meet my fiancée Karlie Elizabeth Kloss...and I guess you'll be seeing a lot more of her in the coming months..." I state giggling and smiling as Karlie drops a kiss on my cheek before she steps off the stage and I continue to perform my top songs that I've ever performed on piano and acoustically. The show continues without a hitch and later that night I walk to my dressing room and as I enter and see Karlie sitting there all I can think of is that 'All Too Well' is no longer about a failed relationship when I was 21 but rather the experiences I shared with Karlie when I was 25 and they still continue to this day. We work through our issues and when we don't agree we talk it out until we do.