Kaylor Family One-Shots

Taking Care of Gracie

"Say hi Gracie..." Karlie states to an overexcited toddler as she glances all around her without paying attention to her mother at all. "Gracie..." Karlie attempts again before finally giving up and putting the toddler next to her. "Come sit with mommy." Karlie tries one more time as Gracie waddles over to her on her little chubby toddler legs, built for support not speed. Karlie watches closely as Gracie gets to within arm's reach before scooping her up and peppering her face with kisses making the toddler squirm around. With a laugh Karlie settles Gracie between her legs and turns around and begins to talk. "Gracie's getting so big now...you'd have to see her with your own eyes to believe her. It's sometimes hard to imagine what life could be like if you were still here with us, but I know that after all the suffering that you've been through it was easier for us to let you go. But that doesn't mean that I don't miss you all the time. Whenever I get the chance I'm out here to visit and I try to bring Gracie as much as I can but it's difficult." Karlie stops and takes a big breathe as she looks around the cemetery in St. Louis, not much has changed since she was a kid, burying her grandmother except everything is older. The stones that were once old are not older, their stones showing the age of their life but not the story within and that's what Karlie struggles with every time she comes here.

Glancing down at the newer black marble with the date of not even two years past she struggles not to cry and alert her daughter of her pain, instead focusing on the curls that Gracie has gotten in the last six months. Breathing in and out Karlie would admit to almost everyone on the planet before her own family as to how hard these last six months have been but she knows that everything she does for the rest of her life is about making her daughter proud of her. "So I guess we will be back next week. Stay safe." Karlie states kissing her fingers before placing them gently on the gravestone. Calling Gracie to her she stands and dusts off her pants of lingering grass cuttings and then heads towards her SUV which houses bodyguards for her protection and Gracie's. "Arms up bubby..." Karlie states as she places Gracie inside her car seat in preparation for the trip back to their house. Climbing in next to her daughter, Karlie nods to the bodyguard before they take off headed home to the warmth that will await them, hopefully including cookies.

Karlie walks through the door at number 15 Kirchfield Street in suburban St. Louis and smiles at the familiar face looking at her. Gracie immediately squirms and fights to get down making me grin at her eagerness. "Hi mom." Karlie states walking over and kissing her mom on the cheek,
"How was it today?" Tracy questions looking at her second eldest daughter who only shrugs and looks at her daughter. "The same as always, Gracie doesn't understand what she's looking at yet so it's mostly just for me I guess." Karlie states taking a fresh cookie off the plate on the island bench as her mom watches on, Tracy walks over towards Karlie and hugs her close giving her a peck on the forehead as she nibbles on a cookie. It's been awhile since Tracy saw Karlie voluntarily eat a cookie without being asked to and it makes her smile but at the same time it's hard to ignore the reason why Karlie stopped eating cookies and stopped existing for the last few years. It's only been because of Gracie that Karlie has been able to continue to live and not fall by the wayside. "It will get easier Karlie. I'm sure it will." Tracy promises her daughter as Karlie simply shrugs and finishes her cookie before trailing off after her daughter who didn't get any further than Joe in the hallway accepting the small girls pats with glee. His tongue lolling all about and dribble going down his face and pooling onto Tracy's hardwood floor, as Karlie watches her daughter she can't help but see traces of the girl's mother in her. The personality may be different but there's no doubt that she's a spitting image of her mother, just like Karlie had always hoped.

Later that night as Karlie tucks Gracie into bed she pulls the comforter up over her body, tucking her in tightly as she laughs with her giggling two year old. That grin that was once toothless is now accompanied by a mouthful of white teeth and a little girl with a large personality. "Goodnight Gracie." Karlie states bending down to press a kiss to her forehead. "Does mama get a goodnight?" Karlie questions her daughter as she gazes down on her. "Nope!" Gracie yelps looking up at her mother. "Why not?" Karlie questions as Gracie sits up and looks past her mom towards her small shelf next to the bed and points at the photo frame. Karlie follows her gaze and smiles down at Gracie before picking up the frame. "What do you want with it?" Karlie questions looking at Gracie as Gracie nods and waits for Karlie to pass it to her like she does every night. "Remember to be gentle honey." She reminds the two year old.
"I know..." Gracie mumbles back looking at the picture with wide eyed enthusiasm, like she's never seen it before, despite the fact she sees it every night. "Are you alright Gracie?" Karlie questions looking down at the famous picture of Gracie's mom, "Okay well it's time for bed now baby girl...kiss mommy goodnight." Karlie watches as Gracie hugs the picture and kisses the image before handing it back to Karlie and snuggling back down in bed. Karlie kisses Gracie and switches on the nightlight and putting the picture back on the shelf. Karlie watches from the hallway as Gracie falls asleep slowly and then Karlie retreats back to her bedroom.

Sitting on the edge of the bed she looks at the bedside where her wedding photo sits and licks her lips wondering whether tonight is the right night to be thinking about everything. Without thinking Karlie reaches for the one photo album that she looks at as much as Gracie's baby book. It's the Big Sur Road Trip the one before it all changed. Flicking through the pages of the photo album Karlie can't help but think about her, Taylor. Her one true love, the only thing that she's ever wanted and known but it's gone now. Karlie traces Taylor's face and thinks about the old times she can't help but think about the times that took Taylor from her, one drink driver that slammed into the side of the SUV and Karlie could have lost Gracie as well, fate had a different idea and when Taylor was barely holding on with Karlie holding her hand she whispered to Karlie, "save Gracie..." Taylor states making Karlie look at her in shock, "no not without you." Taylor could only look at her,
"You have to for Gracie." I hold her hand as the doctors sweep in and cart her off to theatre, less than ten minutes later a screaming Gracie made her entrance into the world as Taylor passed away. Looking at this album always brings back memories and every time I look at Gracie she reminds me of Taylor with her blue eyes and blonde curls she is a spitting image. I look at the cover of the book and smile quietly. I know that the past few years haven't been easy for me, trying to get used to Taylor not being here and with Gracie getting bigger the questions are going to start coming but Karlie knows that it's all going to be worth it in the end.