103 - Drapetomania

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It has been a little over three days and the weather didn't seem to let up. You were outside and it was drizzling. you thought that you could use a bit of fresh air.  The pitter patter of the rain created a shield around you. The sound of raindrops gently falling down as it hit the membrane of your umbrella was rhythmic and relaxing. You loved the rain, you always did. Everything about it was wonderful. There were days when it kept you in but you still loved everything that it did bring, the sounds, the scents, you loved it. The whispering hum as sheets of precipitation plummeted to the ground, the often unanticipated flashes of lightning or the rolls of ominous thunder, it was a symphony for the senses. As a kid,  you enjoyed the natural obstacle course of silver puddles that sent an open invitation to jump on them. 

The sky was grey again. Everything was in some form of grey, it always was in days like this. You wondered what color things were when it rained. Maybe there isn't any color at all. Maybe there is only black, white and different shades of in between. That 'in between' was a space of wonder, of mystery. You could hear the faint rumblings of thunder rolling in the distance. It was lulling you.  

Rain falls like it means to wash you away. It sounds like the heavens where knocking. The pavement, the roofs, the window panes. You had no destination in mind, you just wandered around the unfamiliar neighborhood. You couldn't help but admire the raindrops as it splashed on the ground. They were probably the bravest things on the planet. Why?

Because they weren't afraid of falling.

You chuckled at the thought. Rainy days has a way of getting to you. At the rate you were going, you might just actually lose your way and get lost. You kept a slow and steady pace as you walked, taking your time to soak in everything, every detail of the neighborhood. 

You soon found yourself walking into the neighborhood park. It was quiet save it be for the rain. The playground was all wet. No one else in their right mind would go here on such dreary weather. A sensible person would rather stay in bed, in their homes where it is dry and warm. Then what does that say about you then? Well, you never did make a claim that you were sensible.

Much to your surprise though, you were not as alone as you thought you were. You heard the sound of shuffling feet a little ways in front of you. You failed to notice the other person earlier due to the play set obscuring your view. His back was turned against you so you couldn't see the guy's face. You were curious. You really didn't think anyone would be here much less be outside without an umbrella. You would have seen his as strange but you were out here too. 

"Don't you know that it's rude to stare?"

His voice nearly made you jump. You were staring? You didn't think that he would have noticed you so easily-

He sighed, not turning his back, "I could hear the sound of the rain hitting your umbrella."

You gave up and stepped away from the play set and only then were you able to get a good look at him. 

You felt like the breath was knocked right out of your lungs.

His dark hair was already damp from the rain but he didn't seem to care. He had this tired, almost melancholic look in his eyes but his expression was cold. It was like seeing a ghost.

"You're..." You whispered breathlessly, your eyes were wide. You nearly felt your grip loosen on the handle of your umbrella.

He scoffed, a wry smirk graced his features, "It's not even surprising that you don't remember my name. I never really did expect much from you."

Damon Pierce. You never expected to see him here out of all places. For the briefest moments you saw his brother, your best friend before he... 

Your mouth formed a thin line which he took as his queue to continue, "However, I thought that you'd be above stalking people, (Y/N)." The way he drawled out your name, the way he made the syllables roll of his tongue sent shivers down your spine and they were most definitely not the good kind.

You felt scared all over again but this time, for an entirely different reason. Fear silently crept over you. You could feel your chest constrict slightly, making it difficult for you to breathe. You tried to calm yourself enough to respond, "I wasn't stalking you," your voice was low, despite the anxiousness that was brewing inside you like a storm.

He huffed and shrugged his shoulders, "You could have fooled me. But you know, I didn't think we'd bump into each other again."

You didn't want to have to ever see him again. He was a painful reminder of a wound that you know would never fully heal. The wound, despite it having been years since it has been inflicted, was still fresh in your mind. It was like digging the bones out of your closet.

The rain drizzled on.

He laughed a bit at your silence, "After all this time, cat still got your tongue? You really are the same, old, (Y/N)...aren't you?"

Your breathing hitched in your throat. He was taunting you and you knew it but he did manage to get to you. His words were crawling up your skin. You were allowing him to get the best of you again. Your opinions of yourself were all thrown into the wind. You wanted to refute his statement, but you couldn't find your voice to speak.

You really were just the same person weren't you? Nothing has changed at all. You were the same, gutless, (Y/N).

"...It wasn't..."

He rolled his eyes at you and suddenly, his expression turned dark, "Not this again. Do you honestly believe that I would buy that crap about you having nothing to do with what happened in the past? Just who do you think you're trying to kid?"

You bit your lip. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket and looked away from you, "...You really are an idiot," he muttered, "...You're doing it again aren't you?"

With that, you looked to him, nearly giving yourself a whiplash with how fast you turned. You didn't want to ask but found yourself doing so anyway, "What...what do you mean?"

He gritted his teeth in frustration, "Damn it, (Y/N). Are you really as fucking dumb as I think you are?" he was starting to yell, the sound of his voice was cutting through the silence of the park, "You're doing it again! You're running away again! Is that the only thing that you know how to do?!"

You were stunned. You did not know what to say. 

You wanted to answer his question so badly and say that you are indeed as spineless as he thinks you were. It was easy to run away as you did not want to face your problems...

You held your head low, you finally mustered the will to speak again, "Yeah...I guess it is."

The rain continued to pour.

Drapetomania

(n.) the desire to escape; to run away.  

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