All About Us [Yuri Katsuki x Reader]

152 - Sift

Sleep was the last thing on your mind despite how heavy your limbs felt. You swore that you would most probably sink down the mattress of your bed once your body makes contact with the downy comfort of your sheets however, you highly doubted that your restless mind would give in to your body's demand for a good night's - or is it morning's? (You had lost track of time in the midst of your worry) - rest. 

Having arrived in Hasetsu no more than a couple of hours ago, you immediately headed down to the vet Mari told you Makkachin was in, looking bedraggled whilst barely clutching your luggage, its contents threatening to spew out at any given moment. Once there, you were met with the distressed Katsuki family who were waiting anxiously for any word from the vet.

For a moment, you second guessed yourself. The gravity of the situation made you question whether or not was it your place to be here. I mean, who would be foolish enough to travel thousands of miles in such short notice for - never mind, you knew the answer.  

So you took it upon yourself to do your best in comforting them, reassuring them that this whole ordeal was not their fault. Admittedly, you were aware that you weren't the best person for the job since your exhausted self could no longer fully express what it was you wanted to say. You were just glad that Yuri's mom calmed down for the most part (having been the one who was most affected by the sudden turn of events).

And with a couple more hours of waiting, the vet came and bare the news that precious Makkachin was out of the woods and that once she comes to, you would all be able to take her back home.

You hurriedly got your phone and typed as fast as you could then hit 'send' to both Victor and Yuri respectively.

(Y/N) 6:22 am - Makkachin's OK! 

(Y/N) 6:22 am - vet says we'll b able to brng her home once she wakes up🐶🐶🐶

Considering the time difference between Russia and Japan, you doubt that either of them would reply. You also did not want to spam them with senseless texts so you left it at that. For the next bit, you thought of sending a message only for Yuri's eyes to see. You bit your lip as you thought of what to say next and then you hesitantly got back to typing.

...

...

...

I wish I could be there with you.

You just never did have it in you to press the 'send' button once more but instead chose to discard the message.

This wasn't the time for that. You could not afford to be selfish right now, not with everything that was going on. Not to mention, you were certain that he has a lot on his plate right now, he does not need to think about anything else. You should leave him to focus and he certainly wouldn't be able to do so when he reads something like that.

It would be best to let him concentrate on the competition.

So there you were, lying on your bed, going on zero hours of sleep with dark bags under your eyes, staring blankly at the ceiling.

While the world outside was undoubtedly awake, the inside of your room teased you with silence. Everyone else was asleep and who could blame them? Makkachin is practically family and it was only hours ago did you all came so close to the reality that you almost lost her. But not long after you brought the now healthy dog home, she quickly went back to sleep as soon as she had made her way to Victor's room. 

And yet, despite all of that, you could not bring yourself to drift into unconsciousness. You had tried everything, a warm glass of milk, counting sheep, listening to some music, nothing worked. While the rest of the Katsuki's embraced their dreams, you tossed and turned chasing a metaphorical white rabbit. The time is marked by the ever changing numbers of your alarm clock on your bedside table. It was long ago that the last of the inky darkness left the sky and it would be an eternity before it creeps back again. You could only hope in the meantime that you were not overly aware of every second of every minute.

In the end, you had finally decided that sleep would be eluding you this time...not that it was anything new to you.

Though the usefulness of your thoughts had evaporated some time ago, your mind continues to churn like a runaway motor, constantly regurgitating your other worries that you had kept buried underneath. 

You still have to unpack your things.

You still have to take a shower.

You still have to fucking breathe.

But the weight in your chest wouldn't allow you to take a gulp of air without difficulty.

You had to remind yourself constantly why you did this which gave you a bit of a comfort. But still...Nothing could compare to the comfort you feel when you were in his arms. Maybe you were having a case of mild separation anxiety or something.

Should anyone see your innermost thoughts, they could call you 'clingy', you wouldn't care. They could call you whatever they like but you know that what you feel is the truth.

You let out a breath.

You had fished out your phone from the pocket of your jeans once more. 

You did  not know what exactly were you expecting. A reply? A call back? Anything...just something to distract you from your restlessness. 

But staring back at you is an empty screen and disappointment followed not long after.

The morning had been broken in with the sound of birds chirping outside, full of promise, freshness and newness to come but now, it just sat like a cold cup of coffee waiting to be drained away in the sink.

Deciding to go against your earlier decision, you slowly typed.

(Y/N) 10:07 am - I'll b rooting for u, Yuri 

Although the message was 'short and sweet', the feelings behind them were rather profound. You had chosen your words, opting to be as concise as possible.

You just hoped that he would actually get to read it.

____________________________________________________

I really do not like to be that person but I just have to get this out of my chest.

YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA WHAT POWER YOU HOLD

to every content creator out there, they LIVE off on your feedback, myself included. To anyone who stuck long enough with this story, you might be aware that I periodically take a hiatus (in which updates are sporadic at best) and usually it's because of stuff that puts me in a slump. And you know what gets me out of that slump? 

YOUR KIND WORDS.

And today is a prime example of that. Scrolling through your comments has made me feel a whole lot better (and mind you, majority of those comments aren't even related to the fic but they made me feel GREAT).

Just a friendly reminder that there is an actual person behind the content that you are enjoying 

I'm sorry for the rant...it's just that the past month hasn't been great for me and honestly, I'm running out of coping mechanisms. Again, sorry for the rant.