these are non-canon
---
Amanda: So, Megan, really pushing for the 'bi' over there.
Megan: haha i guess so
Amanda: You don't need to balance it out that well. You can date whoever you want, you know that right? Doesn't have to be a one to one ratio.
Megan: Are you saying you count as two women
Amanda: Nah, I was more referring to the fact that they collectively amount to about one man
---
Adam: Will are you gay
Will: I don't know. Adam, are you gay?
Adam: Why would you even ask that?
Will: You just asked me.
Adam: It wasn't supposed to open the floor for conversation. What is it, Will? Do I look gay to you? Do I act gay?
Will: Adam, your fragile masculinity is showing.
Adam: Will do you think people think that I'm gay
Will: I feel like I'm not getting something here.
Adam: Okay. So you know, it's Adam and Eve...
Will: This is sounding vaguely homophobic Adam and I think we need to have a serious talk
Adam: But instead, you go Adam and Eve aaaand-
Will: ... and Evan?
Adam: is it gay if there's also a girl
Will: Adam you know you're just making this more difficult for yourself right
---
Adam: You know what I think the problem is here
Megan: There are a lot of problems. You're going to have to be more specific.
Adam: There are a lot of hot girls in real life but all the attractive men are in movies or media. You think, oh, they're just always attractive in media, but you're only going to find attractive women in real life.
Megan: I'm not even following this.
Adam: But here's the thing! Then you get chosen by an alien to protect the world and fight evil and then, four months later, your grades are going down the tubes and you find the girl of your dreams AND a guy with a better smile and tighter ass than anyone in the movies and suddenly you're on a couch with them drinking cocoa and watching everything you knew about yourself go up in flames.
Megan: Adam are you okay
Adam: Do you think I can really be okay at this juncture of my life
Megan: (sipping coffee) Maybe we can just revel in the chaos a little while
Evan: my life is chaos
Adam: HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE.
---
Serena: You three are even more cliquey than usual.
Evan: Clique? We're taking clique to a whole new level.
Serena: That's the first time I've heard you admit to it.
Evan: A romantic level.
Adam: Are we seriously coming out to Serena right now
Harper: I am offended and would be more so if this wasn't obvious.
Evan: See it's fine. You know what they say?
Adam: Who the fuck is they and are you just going to come out to everyone without telling me
Megan: Grass is always greener on the other side?
Evan: Irrelevant and untrue. Grass is mediocre no matter where you are. Fuck grass. Anyways, they say, Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.
Adam: *throws his hands up* I mind.
Evan: *whispers* then maybe you don't matter
Adam: I am the main fucking character you take that back
---
Harper: I think I get it. So, Megan, you're bi... Evan's pan... but what does that make Adam?
Evan and Megan, in perfect unison: Indecisive.
---
(creds to AwsomeDragons this joke is entirely his fault)
Evan: *mixing batter with bright, abrasive apron on* Are we sure we can't just eat all of these cookies as dough and/or set the whole batch on fire
Megan: I like to keep my food edible
Evan: ... fine *returns to lovingly mixing cookie batter, puts cookies onto pan and begins to put them in the oven*
Megan: (whispers) The baking pan... is hot.
*making finger guns at Evan* The baking pan... is also hot.
Evan: ... Meg.
---
Adam: *looking out the window*
Will: ha gay
YOU ARE READING
cool and unusual punishment
Randomchrona in high definition but low resolution why do i even live
