Confusion, FtM journal

16 November 2014

I hate periods. I get nauseous and can't focus on shit, which is exactly whats happening right now. My stomach is twisting up into nots and my head is pounding like hell, I fell like I'm gonna freaking pass out. Well aside from that I've calmed down from my weeks long of whatever emotional outburst was. Best thing is I think I really mean it when I say it. What happened to cause this? I found my wireless mouse and got the Far Cry games on sale so I've been sneek gaming. It's amazing how much games do for me, the minuet I slipped into the game and forgot reality it was like all the poison was being soaked out of my veins. It's a great feeling. Anyway art show happened and I dressed up and looked awesome if I do say so myself (the pic is of wut I wore to the art show if you hadn't guessed). Anyway Dom came and Abby was there too, I never saw Diana there and that was a plus cuz I kinda just didn't wanna deal with that that nigh. Me and Dom talked about games the whole time he was there: game marketing, game ethics, game purchases, game communities and sub groups. It was freaking beautiful. I didn't realize how much the two of us geek out together until after he left and Ilsa said she didn't even get a chance to mess with Dom or even interject. Lol, I guess we geek out more than I thought. But ya, for those of you who don't know whenever I introduce a friend to Ilsa that she hasn't met before she normally shouts previsionary contract and then messes with said person for a bit, it's pretty funny to watch but always ends up with me apologizing to said friend for the craziness of my other friends. But it's all in good humor, and living without it as a part of my life would just be odd. Anyway when Dom made it to the art show I thanked him for coming and stuff (cuz he really didn't have to) and then jokingly said something along the lines although I don't know why you wanted to come and be harassed by my friends again, and he replied with a ya, I didn't exactly think that one through and proceeded to joke about it a bit. I love hanging out with Dom, he's another friend like Dylan which is great. And speaking of which the two of us might hang out and go see BH6 if my mom allows it. Anywhore, so y'know how I was talking about Far Cry? Yes well my laptop was lagging big time when I was playing Far Cry 3 to the point of I couldn't get through the first 30s w/out getting caught. So I had to play though the first few seconds gods know how many times before I got it to stop lagging enough to play the game. In which time I fell in love with one of the major villains and shamelessly stared at the main characters brothers ass while following behind him for the 50th time, y'know before he died. That was a sad moment, but I love the villain who shot him more than the dudes ass. Ya one of the big villains, Vaas, is jus an all around amazingly done character from what I can tell after just starting the game. For all reasons I should hate the guy, I mean he kidnaps the main character and his friends and brothers, talks about how he owns you, is sadistic as fuck, and kills one of your brothers (the one with the hot ass). But something about his personality just hooks me in and does the exact opposite, instead of hatting him if I were actually in that situation I would probly go up to him an go teach me. He's a combination of brute force yet cunning, intelligence with absolute stupidity and lack of all logic. I just can't get enough of his character. I'll see if I can get the opening cut scene up on this so you can see Vaas and his insanity. Anyway art show was great, I missed Helen and Nate thou :( (they didn't come). Oh! And I got my laptops updating problem fixed which is great, it means I can actually use flash drives and plug in a game controller now, yaaaaaaay! Guh I wanna say more but gtg, seeya next post. :P

//so vid is moderately long and has gameplay thrown in, I only really wanted to show the first cut scene before gameplay begins but id you want watch the whole thing it's a good game I like it a log so far and I'm not normally to big on games like this. So ya, enjoy and seeya. :P