Sometimes I wonder if it's all worth it, what I'm doing. I'm sitting outside in the cold right now, well if you can even call it cold, it's actually quite sunny and nice. But I'm sick, so lots of things feel cold, coming from the guy who never gets cold. Anyway I'm sitting outside coughing my butt off cuz it's not like I can go inside the house. My sister yelled at me for not putting on what she wanted to watch and because it was too loud for her even though I could hardly hear what they were saying, so she threw a bunch of junk at me and ended up cutting my finger open. Her and my mom then got into it, so yay, yelling. So I try and lay on my bed and my mom tells me to get out so she can make it, I still don't think she has. So here I am sitting outside on the deck barefoot cuz I don't know where else to go. Well now sheets are changed she says, so to go inside or not to go inside, that is the question. Ilsa hasn't been answering my texts, she's probably busy with something, at least thats what I hope anyway. I finished her x-mass gift, I'm not to pleased with how it turned out but my sister says it looks awesome so I guess I'll take her word for it. I was working on Merritt's, but I don'r have a pic of her so I can't get her face or hair right. Then I'm still trying o figure out what to draw for Helen. And then there's Dylan, I have no idea what to do for him. Speaking of which he apparently has an online girlfriend who lives up in Seattle and he's going to go and visit her this break. I heard this from my mom not him by the way. Ya, apparently she looks like me too 0-0. I guess Mrs. Bird made some comment of how she looks like me and why not date me since I'm here but he said no that would be like dating his sibling. Yup, kinda awkward but I know how it goes, hell I dated Brian kinda because he had that smartass know it allness about him that reminded me of Dylan (not the same, but it was similar to a point). But ya, the two of us kinda established that it's not gonna happen between the two of us, it'd just be too weird, he's a brother to me. Yet everyone keeps insisting somethings gonna happen. HE'S STRAIGHT FOR THE GODS SAKES! Anyway ya, theres that. Damn, I really wanna play borderlands right now. Well I'm gonna get going, seeya.
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Confusion, FtM journal
AcakI cut my hair short cuz I wanted it to be like a guys. But everyone still told me I looked pretty. I bought a binder only for cosplay. I ended up wearing it every day. I am a boy. So why does everyone see a girl...
