Closer

125.

Elise would not stop fussing. Eddy felt the heaviness of not being able to comfort her press him down, make him feel useless. Brett had even seemed unsure about letting him hold her. Had he done something wrong?

She had calmed down slightly when the doorbell rang, but Eddy felt himself only freak out more. He had to keep it together while she was here.

Brett went out to open the door and Eddy looked down at his little princess, begging mentally for her to calm down.

He heard their greetings, imagined maybe he hugged her. He wasn't sure, but it made sense. They rounded the corner to the living room and Eddy looked up at Leonors quickly before moving his gaze down to Elise again.

"Oh my god she's... Perfect," Leonora whispered, and Eddy felt the need to hold her closer and make sure Leonora would never get her hands on her. He knew he was being irrational. "Oh my god."

"Wanna hold her?"

Brett's words felt like a blow to Eddy's stomach. That was not part of the deal. She was to see Elise, not to touch Elise. He looked up at Brett quickly, but didn't get any contact with him. He saw Leonora's nod, and a moment later Brett had taken Elise from his arms. He wanted to protest but no sound came out.

What right did he have to protest it anyway?

Leonora sat down in their couch. The couch he and Brett had gotten for their home to make sure there would be no memories of Leonora on it. It felt like he couldn't breathe.

Elise quieted down immediately after being placed in her mother's arms. Of course she did. Of course Eddy couldn't replace her, of course he could never be as good as her.

"You're perfect, absolutely perfect. God..." Leonora whispered, and Brett sat down next to her with a smile on his lips. Eddy wasn't sure he had ever seen a smile like that on Brett's face before, but it got blurry as tears started flowing down his cheeks. Nobody noticed.

"I think she has your eyes."

Eddy didn't hear any more of the conversation as he stood up quickly. He didn't want to see any more of this stupidly perfect little moment. This was what he had robbed Elise of. He had selfishly robbed Elise of a normal, stable home with normal parents and a mother who could take care of her way better than he ever could.

He had guilt tripped Brett into leaving Leonora for him and forced himself into the role as a parent for this poor girl who wasn't comforted by his presence at all, who would probably blame him for ruining her life when she grew up. Why did he have to be so selfish?

Nobody noticed as he slipped into the bedroom to let them have their moment. He was just interference in their lives, the reason Brett and Elise would never be properly happy.

He pulled the duvet over his head and cried as quietly as he was able to.