The LoveShot

The Facade

The next day, she arose with a mild headache. Looking about herself, her lips turned downwards into a frown as she sighed.

Brian wasn't there.

I don't blame him.. I was a mess last night. Plus, I'm just being stupid, right? She fought the battle and lost the war to her tears - as her comforting words were not enough to keep her from breaking. "Stop it. Stop. Stop crying " She whispered to herself repeatedly until a voice interrupted her.

"Sue?" She turned around. He blurry vision instantly recognizing the only figure that could ever be standing there in front of her like this. "Why are you crying again?" He immediately knelt down and began wiping her tears away.

"I-I don't know." She lied. "I just.." She sighed, dropping her head and wiping more tears away.

She soon felt a pair of arms wrap her up within a tight hug as the sweet voice that belonged to those arms said, "It's okay. I'm here for you." Rubbing her back, she compared her feelings to that of a baby being comforted after a long night of crying by the sweet loving arms of the one they love most.

"Brian.." She started as she slowly let go of him. "I have to tell you something." The words struck him. Did he do something wrong? Did she? Was there something horrible that she had been keeping from him? Although his mind was racing, he made sure to keep his full attention on her. Looking her in the face, he waited for her to pick up her head and start talking. But her head was left down when she started.

"I.. I haven't been fair to you lately and I.." she sighed, "because it's due to fear." She stated, looking him in the eyes. "In recent events, it has come to be revealed to me that I-.." She rubbed her face with her left hand. "I'm afraid of intimacy. And that's of any kind... I'm afraid of getting too close to you and I'm afraid of being too far away from you - physically and emotionally and.. all of that." She sighed. "I'm afraid of it. I'm scared that I may change my love for you in ways that I don't think I'm ready for and, even if you did accept me, I don't think that that love would be fair to you." She couldn't look him in the eyes. She was too ashamed and thought that if she did, she wouldn't be able to continue.

"Sue-."
"And Brian, I know that this is just a movie... and that I'm a little weird for mixing up the two - reality from the movie-"
"No, you're not-"
"But Brian," She took in a deep breath, closing her eyes as she did so. "I have to be honest with you... We're close, no doubt, but we have never been, nor did I ever imagine we would ever be getting this close." Brian's confused eyes engulfed Suzy as she struggled to answer them. "And I... I know that much of what I'm saying doesn't make any sense, but just know that I'm telling you this because I know I have to. I know I've been hiding. I know I've been avoiding you. I even know that I'm fal-." She stopped herself.

What are you saying?! Are you nuts?!

She immediately retracted her hands from Brian's as soon as she realized what she was saying. She heard Brian sigh.

"Suzy-"

"I just think it's best for us to say this now and agree to it no matter what." She began, turning away from him. "We have to promise each other something that we know we can keep and will never break, no matter how hard it gets." Every word that came out burned and scorned her lips as they did. She hated every word she was saying.

"Sookie, listen to-"

"We have to promise to never date each other." The words felt like vomit to her. It was a disgusting thing for her to say, despite knowing that that wasn't what she truly wanted.

All sat still.

The intensity of the silence was causing her to cry silent tears over the very thing that she was doing to herself. She didn't want this, but to her conscious mind, it was for the best. It was now his turn to put his head down.

"Even after all this time, you're still running from me..." He painfully whispered, causing her to turn around to face him. "You truly haven't changed after all this time." His eyes piercing through hers, she now felt his pain atop of hers. "Is this what you really want?" Her eyes fell to the ground as she began talking.

"I think.. it's for the best-"

"If it's for the best, then why won't you look at me like you usually do when you mean something?" She paused - her words stuck in her throat. "Just tell me that like you usually would if you truly mean it." She could practically see his heart bleeding out in front of her, despite his face and voice showing no emotion whatsoever.

"Brian," She started, but just couldn't finish the sentence. She had no other words to say that could justify her conscious mind's rash decisions.

"You're running. Back then, when we were kids, you ran and even now, you're still running." He shook his head in disbelief, pain and confusion. "I've never done anything for you to misplace your trust in me. Why can't you even trust me with the smallest thing? Am I not your best friend?"

"No, Brian. I just-."
"Just what? Because obviously a 24 year friendship means nothing to you." He spat.
"Brian, no. I trust you, it's just that I'm scared." She said, her voice small with tears welling up.

"Scared of what?" He demanded.

"Of loving you!" She shouted back, tears pouring down her face. "I never wanted to fall for you! I never wanted to ruin our friendship or anything! I just wanted to keep everything simple - have a little fun and still stay friends after making a great movie together that we could laugh at years after the fact. That's all I've ever wanted with you, nothing else!"

"So you think that being in a relationship will ruin us?" He said - his voice defeated as he held her. She just continued to cry and shake in his arms as he began to rub her back and nod. Sighing to himself, he rested his head on top of hers.

The silence was everything they needed in this moment.