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BLURB:
Archer's plan is simple, really.
Find the deadliest pirate ship in the sea, the one that cons its prey in the dark of night with a deathly black exterior and blood red sails. Trick the charismatic Captain and his cunning associate into bringing him aboard. Play the role of a merciless pirate while he rides the ship straight to the most dangerous island in existence. Find his parents. Kill the King.
Maybe it's not simple. Maybe It's insane and ludicrous and far-fetched, but it's also unknown, and, well...
There's adventure in the uncertainty.
***
YOUR COVER: (9/10) I like the uniqueness of the cover, and the way the photo is presented seems to hold a symbolic meaning. The way the title and author's name is presented is also pleasing to the eye, and it looks very professional here! It doesn't hold the spark that I like to see in covers; it doesn't make me stare at it longer than other covers. How can you make your cover stand out from others and make it eye-catching? You can keep it as it is, but I suggest looking for other covers as options from graphic designers on Wattpad.
YOUR TITLE: (7/10) While I can definitely see the meaning behind the title, I'd like to point out that so many books have protagonists venture into unknown territories, so this title is vague and generic. Try to narrow it down to attract the right audience for your story, not just something widely known in adventure stories. Along with that, your title doesn't have the best ring to it. You can keep it as it is, but I'd recommend finding a more pleasing title, whether it be a significant name in the story, a symbolic object, or meaningful phrase.
YOUR BLURB: (4/5) I enjoyed the way you presented your blurb and ended it with a note of finality. You stayed with your topic and explained the main goal, character, and setting of your story. There were a few errors, such as the capitalization of the word "It's." Keep in mind that it doesn't need to be capitalized.
YOUR HOOK: (5/5) I love how you presented your writing capabilities right from the first sentence. That way, you could show your audience what your storytelling would look like, as well as informing them of the character, scene, and setting. The little similes and metaphors added in only enhanced the reading experience.
YOUR GRAMMAR: (7/10) The biggest problem I found were your commas. Keep in mind that commas are for separating different topics within a sentence. For example, take this sentence: "He gasped as he fell, tripping over the shoes, that were in the hallway." There's an extra comma here; can you find it? The reasoning here is that the clause "that were in the hallway" is incomplete; it can't be a sentence or a topic by itself. In fact, it's part of the topic/clause, "tripping over the shoes." The comma shouldn't be separating it. The correction would be: "He gasped as he fell, tripping over the shoes that were in the hallway." I found that you often broke up your sentences into incomplete commas, though there were also times where you missed a comma or two as well. Keep this rule in mind for future writing, and I suggest combing through your chapters thoroughly; as I've only pointed out a few of these mistakes.
