Sick and Tired

Chapter 37

TW: ED, SH

Six more days have passed. Meredith is hating being in the hospital more and more. She feels so guilty after eating. Each bite she takes she feels bad about herself. She knows she has to eat in order to get out of the hospital but that doesn't make it any easier to do.

Dr Bailey has paged Derek to a conference room. She has something that she needs to tell him. A few minutes after he gets the page he arrives.

"Good afternoon Bailey. What's up? Is Meredith okay? I know she's starting to eat more now which is great!" Derek said smiling at Bailey.

"Yes, she is eating 75% of her meals as of this morning at breakfast. I'm so proud of that girl. Anyways other than to share that good news with you I wanted to warn you about something." Bailey said to Derek.

"What is it?"

"So Meredith has been eating all of her meals with Cristina. She comes to her meals and helps her through them. She encourages her that she can do it which is great. But I just found out from Cristina that she had a family emergency come up. Somethings going on with her Mom she said. So anyways she had to leave without any warning at 4pm today. I'm not sure how that is going to affect Meredith. I'm hoping she'll be okay and continue eating but I'm not sure. And Cristina was not even able to tell Meredith that she was leaving." Bailey said.

"Oh wow. Meredith isn't going to like that. You said she already gets upset with each meal so this is going to be an added challenge for her. How long does Cristina think she'll be away for?" Derek asked Bailey.

"I'm not sure. She said it would probably be two to four days but she's just not sure."

"Do you think she'll let me eat with her?"

"I'm not sure. I hope so but we'd have to find out from her."

"What time is her dinner at?" Derek asked.

"It's at 5:30."

"Okay unless I get paged for an emergency I'll be there for her if she is okay with that. Thank you for letting me know Bailey."

"Of course Shepherd. I want that girl to succeed and so I need everyone on the same page with her treatment and everything that is going on involving her."

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It is now 5:30 and Meredith is waiting for Cristina to arrive. The nurse just brought in her dinner and Meredith is feeling very anxious about it. Five minutes go by and still no Cristina. "Where's Cristina?" Meredith asks the nurse.

Before the nurse gets a chance to answer Derek walks into the room. "Hey Mer, I was wondering if I could eat dinner with you?"

"Where's Cristina? She always eats with me."

"Cristina had a family emergency come up and she had to leave an hour and a half ago. She won't be back for a few days." Derek said pulling up a chair next to Meredith's bed.

"B-but I need her. I can't eat without her." Meredith said starting to cry.

"I'm here Mer. I'll help you." Derek said trying to soothe his girlfriend.

"I need Cristina. I don't want to eat without her." She wailed. "I-I can't do it."

"Mer, it's gonna be okay. You're going to be just fine. You can do this."

"No I can't!" Meredith screamed. "Please I need my person." At this point Meredith is crying so much she's starting to hyperventilate.

"Breathe for me Mer. There you go. I know you want her. But unfortunately she's not in Seattle right now. I'm sorry she didn't get a chance to tell you. Can I eat with you please?"

All of a sudden a pager went off.

"Crap 911 to the pit I'm sooo sorry Meredith. I'll be back for your meals tomorrow I'm so sorry. This was the worst timing. But you can do this. I love you and I believe in you." Derek gave Meredith a kiss and hugged her.

"I love you too" she said sobbing.

Derek hated leaving her. That was the worst possible moment to leave. He wished he didn't get pages during her first meal without Cristina but he didn't have a choice. Shadow Shepherd was out with the flu tonight and Derek was the only neurosurgeon on call tonight.

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Without Cristina or even Derek Meredith had a very tough meal. She didn't want to eat it at all. The nurse was trying to encourage her but Meredith was just ignoring her and refusing to eat. "I NEED CRISTINA" she yelled in between sobs.

Meredith refused to touch her dinner that night. She knew Bailey and Wyatt wouldn't be happy with her but at that moment she didn't care. She didn't have any confidence in herself.

Meredith quickly tired herself out from all of her crying and soon fell asleep. It's going to be a rough few days for her.

Uh oh Cristina is out of town. How will this affect Meredith? Don't worry everything will all work out and start going well for her again very soon.