Turning Table

Part 92

*** it's time to come clean ***

🌹Liyana🌹

Me: that is crazy I'm not pregnant..."
Him: I know your body Liya, and there is a change in it, your breast, your hips, your stomach, I know where I must touch you to make you cum, I know what you like to eat and I know how strong you are... This forever emotional horny thick girl I made love to right now is not the one I first made love to"

Me: thick?" I chuckled
Him: I know your size remember I bought your a dress and you are size 30, when I brought the designer with new clothes a few weeks back she said you not size 30 you now 34, "
Me: so I'm just fat? Yeah right big deal "

I said standing up I took my robe and put it on
Him: think about it,  all these months we have been making love without any protection...not once have I pulled out, and you told me you are not on contraceptives"

Me: oh my God!"
I'm thinking, trying to figure out when last I had my period, I panic when I realized that ever since I started sleeping with Ntsika I have never had  my period, well it did no matter then because my cycle was abnormal but realizing now that it's been months since I had my period! Just got my heart beating fast. I immediately felt anxiety and worry, I was not expecting this, could it be? No man I feel fine, look fine this man must be crazy.
Just when my heart rate was subsiding to normal the conflicting emotions just swiftly took over, thinking of the morning sickness,  the exhaustion, dizzy spells, me crying all the time.
For the love of Christ, I'm a health worker how could I have missed that my body is going through changes

Me: No! "
Him: Liyana!! " he is standing next to me holding my hands, I feel tears in my eyes, damn it I'm crying yet again, this can not happen my mother already thinks I'm a disappointment in the Ziqubu family and being pregnant will just drive her over the edge.

" I think I'm going to be sick," I said
running to the bathroom and start vomiting, Ntsika walks in the room and brushes my back
Me: please step out you are not supposed to see this " I flush and sat  on the toilet seat, he kiss my forehead and wipes my mouth
Him: I'm in love with you so, you may fart, take a dump, or vomit I wi be by your side because I plan to spend my life with you "

I ran my hand on my face.
Me: Baby we are not sure if  I'm pregnant or not only a test will prove that, so can we not jump the gun "
He side smile
Him: I know you pregnant...but let's do it your way I will book an appointment with my Dr "
I looked at him, I can't be pregnant not know, his mother will think I trapped him with a baby, my mother will think I whore my way to riches, God no please not now.
Him: everything will be ok I promise "
Me: baby or with no baby right?"
Him: you really don't know your body, what are you five or something?"
Me: shut up!"
I playfully hit him and he chuckle pulling me into a hug.
I begged him to drop the pregnancy topic even though it ate me up inside just the thought of it. But for now, I was not going to entertain it. I just pray that I'm not pregnant.

It's the wee hours in the morning  and my man decided to destruct by cooking for me,
Well, whenever he decide to step behind the stove he also wants me to get involved, Ntsika liked to cook, not just fry an egg or all those greasy food but really well balance food, and that alone intrigues me.  My curiosity about his cooking skills led to me having more dates with him, and our first "I love you's" were exchanged over a feast of Asian-fusion dishes and a bottle of wine, and boom here we are now.

Our cooking has allowed us to translate past experiences into the present, sensory ones. He has introduced me to the serious art of sandwich construction, where each ingredient is thoughtfully balanced according to texture and structural soundness. We've picnicked on mountains, art galleries, roof tops, and seashores, I have learned how to pickle things,  I have felt myself learning and growing and upskilled my cooking skills in a way that has never before been possible because, to be honest, no women prefers a man who cooks better than her.

So Cooking is an important creative outlet for me, and I'm blessed to share it with my partner. Even though I know he is only doing this to test our communication,
As I prepare the stir-fry he drops the most unexpected topic

"When last did you speak to your mother?"
I stop steering the pan but I did not look at him
Him: babe we can't avoid this topic forever, you know my family I have told you about them, even evolved Dudu to tell you more, but you always cagey when it comes to your family "

Me: it's complicated "
I said wiping my hands
Him: I'm building a future with you, and there is a baby on the way..."
I cut him off
Me: we don't know IF THERE IS A BABY!!"
he sigh and looked at me
Me: I'm sorry... "
Him: you always get worked up when it comes to talking about your family, should I be worried?"
Me: we come from different worlds Ntsika my family is...."
I breathe out loud and looked do

wn
Me: I love you so much and I'm just afraid that when you get to know my roots, my family you will look at me differently "

Him: baby come on, why do you always think I will leave you "
Me: because I grew up not loved or cared for, so I have major insecurity issues..."
I bite my lip trying not to cry
Him: talk to me about that,  when it started, how it started why it started "
Me:you see The hot pursuit of love can be blinding, it's no lie that you love me and Of course I love you too. My love for you brings you joy, sends you to joyous, lofty heights that when you with me you never want to come down from, but the same heart that can send you into a loved-up euphoria can trip you up and have you falling into something more toxic. . . "

I sat down and breath out loud, it's time to come clean,
Me: It all started when my father left my mother...