Turning Table

Part 100

***I hate my mother ***

🌹Liyana 🌹

I choose to not respond or stoop to her level. But take in the toxic words she throws at me.
Regardless of how many times I show her compassion, kindness, support, and love, that has not stopped her from verbally slapping me, on my one cheek, and when that cheek starts to burn I let her slap the other.

At times I look at my life and think of everything I have archived and I realized that having a mother like her has made me use her as my teacher in life, As much as I'm hurt, have been through the worst kind of depression and fighting suicidal thoughts caused by how my mother treats me, it's so strange that I have developed a deep sense of compassion for others, the importance of being kind, patience, emotional intelligence, the strength of character and there isn’t much anyone else I face in life that can say anything worse that will shake me.
I have learned how to handle difficult people. And try to mitigate the damage her behavior has done.

As much as Mangalisa wants to sort this shit we call a family out I know for a fact that my mother will never listen or better yet control her behavior. But I'm hoping that throughout this meeting it can teach him a lot about what I have endured and what I deal with.

I look at her and I want answers to why she hates me, a part of me understands it has little to do with me, and everything to do with her own psychological pain. I know I am an Obedient child, a good kind person, and that what she says is just an attempt to hurt me or make herself feel “better”.

I was brought back from my thoughts as I heard Mangalisa laughing so hard,
" it's like you forget that she is the only person with a master degree in this house, She studied Pharmacy and Physiotherapy that to me makes her a Dr, so she is entitled to spoil herself... And from where I'm looking it's way overdue!"
Mangalisa said to my mother but the women turned and looked at me,
" shut up Mangalisa I'm not talking to you !"
Mom said looking at me
Fear crept in, I wish Mangalisa did not say that 
Mangalisa: tough luck cause I'm talking to you, so what do you want from her? Is it the car? Her glow? Her watch?...or the fact that a few months away from you she gain weight?"
Ma: ooh I see what this is, so this thing came to my house and decided to turn you against me! ...Liyana unoSatane uyezezwa... Kakhe kahle ufunani la?"
Mangalisa: wow Ma, really... Don't you get tired of pulling this card of projection on Liya, your life is so miserable and instead of fixing it, you blame the only person who has to help you! Never leave your side, feed you, and take care of you! "
Ma: you don't know nothing about what I have to put up with!"
Him: I know that my father left because of you!! "
Ma: Mangalisa you starting to piss me off "
Mangalisa: iqiniso liyababa mommy dearest, look around you, you have no one, first dad left, I left and Liyana, but out of everyone that left you, you blame Liya for baba leaving! I know you hate that she achieved her goals without depending on a man or anyone, I know you hate that she gives you money instead of me... You desperately want to see her fail but your words, your insult only make her rise...so who is the devil between you two?"

I took a few steps back my head is screaming to walk out of this house but my feet feel like there are glue to the floor,  Mangaliasa just dropped the microphone, the house is quiet, and if looks could kill I will be long dead judging from the look my mother is giving me,

Ma: what did you say?"
Mangalisa: you heard me... So let's cut the bull shit and place all our cards on the table... I'm tired of this... You like it or not  we going to hush everything out and fix this family you have destroyed"
Mangalisa looks at me and he sees that my heart is beating in my throat
Him: hey look at me "
I feel his touch on my arms my eyes slowly look up at him
Him: I got you ok "

I bite my lip nodding
And right on queue, my mother started screaming, she started with the name-calling directly thrown at me.
Her: ooh cut off the melodrama bullshit!... Liyana! You enjoy this, you just could not stand seeing me connecting with my son, you are so  toxic, you have poisoned my son against me!!..."