𝘐𝘯𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵

𝘛𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺-𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯.

𝘊𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘵'𝘴 𝘗.𝘖.𝘝.

"Miss Richards, doctor Maddison is ready for you."- said a nurse with a smile as I nodded, following her to the doctor. 

"Please, take a seat, Miss Richards."- stated the doctor with a bright smile, wearing gloves. 

"You are here alone?"- she asked, watching me close the door. 

"Yes."- I replied softly, getting an apologetic look from her - a look that I will never get used to.

"We will run a couple of tests first and then I will tell you the results, alright?"- she asked warmly and I nodded, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear. 

One test - a few questions. It went on for a while until she finished gathering information and moved on to the explanations. She explained the morning sickness, trimesters, what to expect, spotting, what to avoid and what to try to do more of.

"I am happy to tell you that you are nearing 5 weeks, Miss Richards. Upcoming Monday you will be 5 weeks pregnant!"- doctor Maddison announced delighted, giving me a copy of my file. 

"Your little baby is developing well, it is a bit too early for an ultrasound, but once you get to 7-8 weeks, I'd like to do it regularly from then on."- she explained as I nodded, soaking the information up. 

"The test results are satisfactory, but your weight and diet concern me. You are too thin for your height - only 45 kilograms that are nearing 44. You must gain a healthy weight, Miss Richards, at least 50 kilograms and from there on some weight will add as the baby will grow."- said the doctor, glancing at me in worry. 

"Try eating more healthy fats: avocado, nuts, seeds, fish, dark chocolate. I will prescribe you supplements to provide an extra source of vitamins and minerals for you and your baby. It will be good if you ate more low-fat or fat-free dairy products, whole grains and protein. Your water consumption is marvellous, I have no comments about it."- she said calmly, writing it all down in detail for me. 

She explained more things before we finished and I left. 

I exited the hospital, heading to get things she underlined as the most important. 

3 days went by. 

I found the hospital, where I hope to give birth at: it is far from the apartment, 2 hours by bus, but it is all I can pay for. It is a small hospital, nothing over the top, a peaceful area and friendly, good stuff. I wanted a hospital, which is a few blocks away from my apartment, but God, I won't handle its prices. 

I thought of seeking help from special organisations, which help single parents, but I don't fit into the list of people, who could receive help: I am healthy, I am capable of looking after myself and my baby, I have a place to live in, I have 3 jobs and I found myself a medical help. One organisation helps single parents in general, but they didn't reply to me yet and I don't think they will - it's been 5 days since the time I applied.

In any case, I am trying to maintain my life on my own because I cannot sit around and wait for somebody to help me. 

I entered the grocery store and took a small cart, planning to get 3 things: avocado, plain yoghurt and linen seeds. Chocolate, in spite of how much I crave it, is too expensive - the cheapest bar is 25 pounds. It is a couple of small yoghurts or a few avocados or a few bus rides. 

I took everything I came here for and paid for it all 15 pounds. 

"Thank you."- I told the cashier, taking my items before leaving. 

I walked down the street, thinking about what awaits me tomorrow until a few baby stores appeared in my sight. 

Happy mums with big, cute bellies choosing beautiful items for their children, smiling and conversing with their partners, who are just as delighted and smiley.