Today we came back home and I was so excited. Those 4 days were the worst days of my life, I've never been hit so much.
Going home would be hard but that's were I wanted to be. I loved being under Jahseh but I need a break or something on me will end up broken.
Or like Dj said, he'll kill me.
The thought never stopped running through my mind. Maybe if I made Jahseh mad enough he would kill me.
"Ouu I missed you mija" my mom said as she hugged me.
She insisted in picking me up from the airport because she missed me. The hug she was giving me right now showed that but it always made everything hurt.
"Here let me help you with your stuff" she told me, taking my book bag while I still rolled my suitcase.
I followed behind her to the car. She talked to me the beginning of the car ride home but I wasn't feeling good today. Not today, today thoughts of me killing myself flooded my mind.
"Mija are you listening?" My mom asked making me look at her.
"What's wrong? Did something bad happen on the trip?" She asked me and I shook my head.
"It was okay, he gave me a ring" I told her, showing her the ring he'd given me yesterday.
"Aww that's so cute" she told me and I nodded.
"You sure nothing happened mija? You don't look yourself, you look dead behind the eyes" she told me making me look down.
"Did he hit you?" She asked me and I shook my head, lying.
"I want to see when we get home" she told me making me shake my head again.
"No mamí I'm not going to strip in front of you, he didn't do anything" I lied more making her suck her teeth.
"You're lying mija, he did something. You don't look happy anymore so when we get home let me see" she told me and I shook my head.
"No."
"You can keep on your ropa interior" she spoke.
With her Spanish beginning to come out I knew she was stressed so I decided not to say anything else. When we get home I can't let her see this though, it'll break her.
When we got home I practically rushed in, trying to close myself in my room but my mother was fast.
"Por favor, mija, déjame ver, sabía que está invadiendo tu privacidad, pero necesito asegurarme de que estás bien, es mi trabajo."
(A/N Please, mija, let me see, I know it's invading your privacy, but I need to make sure you're okay, it's my job)
I began to cry from her words which made her sigh and pull me into a hug.
"no más Jahseh" she spoke and I shook my head.
(A/N no more jahseh)
"¿no? Déjame ver" she spoke and I shook my head again.
(A/N No? Let me see)
I stood myself up and moved away from her but she came with me.
"por favor mamí" I cried, trying to move her hands away.
(A/N please mami)
She wouldn't move so I tried fighting her off but she flipped me on my back and placed her knees on my arms so I couldn't move.
I hyperventilated as I heard her cutting at my shirt but I couldn't do anything but lay there and cry.
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