Sex, Crϋe and Ratt 'N' Roll, A Ratt & Mӧtley Tale

Chapter 44- Lips of an Angel Part 1 (Stephen Pearcy)

I never thought.... that my life would turn out like it did. That I would for a time find it so damn hard to hold on to love and that love.... I would take it for granted and cast asunder so cruelly and I never thought that same love, I would lose not once but twice. I still to this day, regret how I did Vince, breaking his heart...not being there. But then he gave me a second chance and I feel HARD, truly fell in love with him all over again. We became an actual couple, and always strived to work on our issues but do so together. After all burdens are lighter when shared.

It was Sex, Crϋe & Ratt 'N' Roll but ONLY with our partners.  Tommy Lee had a rough time with his morning sickness and it lasted a while, because it turned out.... well, we all found out he was pregnant with twins around about the middle of April & Warren was a nervous wreck, not about being a father.... but because Tommy was having such a rough go of things. Kingston was by then 2 months old, and Nikki and Robbin had found their home together...beautiful place, perfect for their family. Mick Mars and Paul Stanley and their little family...everyone was really doing well. And then things got busy with ALL bands recording not just Ratt, but Kiss and Mӧtley...there were appearances, a tour....and Vinny and I managed to find our own house and ended up somehow moving in during all the chaos AND planning our wedding. Course we had a lot of help from our family. It was emotional I remember for Nikki and Vince to leave Mick and Paul's house, since it really saved their lives, and it led me and Robbin both ultimately back to our loves. And it would turn out Tommy & Warren weren't the only ones that were parents to be.... Mick announced around August 12, that Paul was 2 months pregnant with their second child, and both were thrilled as you can imagine....and again.... they weren't the only ones as it would turn out.... you will see....

Where our Rockin' tale here picks up is September 1986.... or should I say, September 18, 1986, the day I married my Sugar Cookie: Vince and certain 'signs' would begin to show...or rather I'd realize....

I am getting married today...holy shit.... i honestly.... i mean its mind blowing, emotional...surreal you name it. These past months have been a fucking whirlwind to say the least, super fucking busy and yet....and yet, Vince has been my biggest priority.... taking time for him, for US...being loyal, loving.... just everything he needs me to be, the best version of myself...

"Hey Man.... you, ok? Nervous?"

"Huh?" I shake my head and realize that Robbin has just addressed me, looking concerned rocking Kingston's little stroller gently back and forth. Nikki, I think meanwhile is with Vince, helping him get ready. After a few moments I reply with, "I was just thinking about the past several months, like with how busy we've been...and how despite that, Vince, and I...I mean he's been my greatest priority...I just.... love him....so much has changed. So yeah, I guess I am nervous...moreover, anxious...specially to see him...to make sure he's ok."

Come to think of it.... i imagine he IS in much the same way as I am right now, but.... the past few days, he's been I don't know super moody and depressed....

"Man, you're spacing out again.... i can promise you, he'll be ok. You've got yourself a damned good partner.... but I know that look...." Robbin trails off in thought and because it seems Kingston is asleep AND Nikki enters the room looking extra anxious and turns to me....

"Vince is.... really nervous, he's getting sick....and I wonder...." I don't let him finish before I take off, muttering an apology...though I think he understands as I make my way to where Vince is and am greeted at the door by Warren.

"I take it Nikki told you?"

"Let me talk to him...see him.... please..." I beg, and I enter the room focused solely on Vince, vaguely aware of a very pregnant and dozing Tommy Lee, Paul Stanley with Hope and Mick and I hear the murmur of voices in the bathroom, Bobby and Juan and heart-breaking sobs of my sugar cookie. I knock on the door, scared shitless. "Vinny? Sugar Cookie? I-I hear you were getting sick.... talk to me and let me in please." I feel the onset of tears.

"No!" Comes the croaked/strangled reply. "I-I.... will be...ok...... bad luck an' I UGH..." Followed by retching sounds. I try the door and realize its locked, "Vince PLEASE.... Bobby, open the fucking door man..." Shuffling and I open the door, quickly asking for ginger-ale and stuff to maybe help himfeel better and then hold Vince's hair back, trying to soothe him.

"Vince, sugar cookie.... I'm not angry at you, whatever is going on.... i just want to take care of you. I'm here, ok? If we need to...." Vince cuts me off shakily.

"N-No.... i wanna marry you....an' I'm sorry."

"Hey, I will marry you anytime, anyplace, ok? I'm more worried about YOU. Now, let's get you resting and all, ok?"

Vince murmurs a reply, as someone hands me some crackers and ginger ale, and some peppermint tea...after I help Vince clean his mouth out and help him off the floor and I realize how pale he looks....

I stay for a bit, until he insists on getting ready...or finishing, still looking pale and in tears...and he looks like he feels better than he did, still it fucking broke my heart and I demanded to be told of any changes and if Vince needed me, but moreover I made sure my sugar cookie, took it easy as I make my way back to where I'd come from....

I apologize to Nikki, holding back tears who takes it all in stride and he and Robbin help me feel better, somewhat....and I meanwhile, despite what's happening....am eager to see Vince, and hoping he will be ok....

I blink and its time.... standing on the beach, at mine and Vince's spot beneath a rose covered arch, done in various shades of pink roses, the crash of the waves...the smell and taste of salt in the air. My family...here with me, Juan and Bobby at my side and the ceremony begins, me anxiously awaiting my love, my sugar cookie.

I am still really worried about Vince, I didn't wanna leave him earlier. Nikki had this knowing look; I should KNOW what's going on with Vince. It's not just nerves, it can't be. Him getting so ill, I could tell Vince didn't want to be...and it scares him. still, I could see in his eyes...and feel how much he loves me....

My eyes widen and the tears that I was holding back fall at seeing Vince, who although is very pale, is looking like a fucking angel.... slowly, walking towards me, on the arms.... of Juan and Bobby, as Nikki and Robbin with Kingston are already seated. The point is...time STOPS seeing my love.

Those whiskey eyes shinny with tears, his make-up done to perfection.... a tux, with a pink bowtie, black lace gloves.... how the fuck did I get so lucky? to this day i still ask myself that. 

After an eternity, time starts again as I anxiously check over Vince, taking his hands as together we stand before the officiant and are soon in our own little world. 

"I missed you Vinny.... how're you feeling sugar cookie....and you look STUNNING by the way." I whispered in a rush, unable to help myself, caressing his face with one of my hands, him leaning into my touch.

His lip's part....and he whispers his reply....

"I missed you too...an' I am sorry about earlier.... nah, you look stunning."

"Shh, don't apologize and your beautiful baby. I love you."

"I love you too." He whispers, resting now his forehead against mine, me holding his hands.

A/N: I know it's a bit of a cliffhanger, but I promise it will be worth it. Stay tuned for part 2 which pretty much will pick up where this chapter leaves off.