My Step Brother's Obsession - Carly #2

What Have You Done?

Kaden

I watch from my window as Carly leaves. I'm still mad about how everything went. I know last night should never have happened, but it did. I knew I had fucked up once the words left my mouth. I meant every fucking word. I had always had different feelings towards Carly that weren't brotherly. I can't help how I feel, but she made me feel like trash, like my feelings didn't mean anything so much, so she crushed them. I loved her more than words could ever say. I told her the truth about my feelings and why I was so angry when she got back with Aiden. I can't believe she threw it all back in my face. I thought at least I had a smidgen of a chance of being with her, but she blew me off totally. Maybe I should never have broken off with Charlie, but we agreed it wouldn't go anywhere if we were too far apart, and I had agreed. It had been the best months of my life with him, and it helped me forget my feelings for Carly, until last night she never stopped me. Not once, she'd probably blame it on the drink, and maybe she would be right. It felt so right, but things just got way out of hand.

She looked up toward my bedroom, and she looked pained and like she regretted what she had said, but it's too late now. We'll never be the same ever again, especially what happened between us last night and the aftermath.

If she wants me to stay away from her and have nothing to do with me, then so be it. I'm not chasing a girl who wants nothing to do with me anymore, no matter how much it hurts to know your own sister wants nothing to do with you because you want more than you could ever have with her. She's my maternal half-sibling, not blood related to both parents, just one. I didn't see any harm in it. There's only one person that I had confided in about my feelings towards her, my best friend, the same friend who had kissed me before we had finished high school forever. He was the second boy to kiss me, and it made me rethink my sexuality.

Carly wasn't bothered or freaked out by my declaration, even if she didn't want to be with me like I did with her, she didn't call me a freak and a greedy bastard. She's definitely not homophobic. Unlike many of my friends, I had no idea he was even gay. He was always the outspoken and outgoing one of our group.

The girls loved him, so it surprised me when he kissed me out of the blue. He smiled and winked at me, telling me if I ever found out what type of relationship I wanted, I knew where to find him. We had gone our separate ways, but that kiss changed everything in me. I am still asking myself who I am attracted to.

He left for college somewhere by the seaside. His parents had gotten a big promotion, and he had the best grades I had seen anyone have. He could do anything his heart desired. Even get the guy or girl he wanted, but I think he perfected the same gender. We have spoken a few times. He was having the time of his life, especially now he had come out to everyone. He was the queen of the party. He was so confident in his own skin he didn't care what people thought about him and I admired him for that. We hadn't spoken for a while, but I knew he was seeing someone. I hope they treat him right. He deserves to be treated like the angel he is.

I closed my curtains knowing that this would be the last time. I would ever see Carly.

I heard the honk of the horn letting me know dad had left and Carly was going to uni and starting the next phase of her life, one that would last four years before she graduated and become a counselor for those who had been through tough times just like she had. I was so damn proud of her, especially with all the shit she had been through. But I'll never forget the last words she said to me. "Do us both a favor and stay the hell away from me and go somewhere I'm not, so you can't get any idea of us ever being anything more than siblings."

I clenched my fist and hit the wall, shattering the plaster underneath my hand. My knuckles were bleeding as I continually punched my wall.

"Kaden." My mom said, knocking on the door.