the breath has stopped
the feeling has frozen
to burn then like a wasp's sting
cold and hot at once
everything and nothing between the ribs, beating up the lungs
now breathing hurts like never before
and walking old paths is painful.
but has it really gotten just worse?
haven't you picked up gold on that spiral?
hasn't that spiral given you a vertigo
and made you feel like you feel like you feel like ...
???
???
???
WHAT THE FUCK.
where am i. it seems... maybe... it's lost and it's refound
refunded
give me back my life.
.
so i did. worked hard while not working
having fun while asleep
reaching for joy
crying in my soul
SOBBING DO KURWY
telling myself NO. fuck u.
fuck it.
fuck life.
fuck every human
in fire and gas.
with acid. choked on shame.
and then, well. the pain has remained.
but have you lost? have you not found
treasure upon treasure
blessings in disguise?
haven't you found yourself? the wisdom, the path
of joie de vivre?
hasn't it felt like a mind melted into the universe
plugged in to some electric glory?
hasn't it felt like that?
it's not just a memory. you've BEEN CHANGED.
it's not a lie, a fluff, a consolation.
not some stupid "it's okay" when it's not; a tricky affirmation.
you've stopped. dove deep.
resurfaced.
it was a break. not a fallback.
are you the same, only worse?
no. im not.
aren't you proud of yourself every year? "id not want to go back; THIS me is the best me"? isn't that what you say?
yeah...
take off the gloomy glasses, man.
and see not just where u fell but where you've become a gem.
still not fully polished. got dirty in the process.
yes. that's true. it's a PROCESS. and you're in it. you can pick up where you left off, or reverse the damage
and regrets will fade away.
and even if you fail
that's okay. we'll all shit, piss, vomit, get pimples, yadda yadda, and we'll all die one day anyway.
.
.
.
sometimes life is simple.
but even then, it's never easy.
.
.
.
28.10.24 (opublikowany 1.11.24)
CZYTASZ
heart beats
Poesía~ poezje itp ~ w gruncie rzeczy, jesteśmy worami mięsa, kości, i flaków. ale w tym worze mieści się mózg, a mózg to wciąż niezbadana złożoność, która z prostego wora potrafi uczynić święty graal. the heart beats/heartbeats/heartbeat: serce bije, ser...
