heart beats

a cute unicorn and existential somethings go on a date in [fill the blank]

idk what those pale circles on pink fluffy unicorn dancing on rainbow are supposed to be.

maybe nothing.

what's the point of being. why would anything be. instead of not be. being is not better. because FOR WHAT (if u thought of sth: and WHAT FOR would THAT be good?).

we're pointless.

too occupied with BEING to realise the absurdity of that phenomenon. (what's the point tho. we'd still be. and we'd still want to continue being. well, some could get depressed i guess. humans are exceptionally funny life forms).

to be

or not to be

what's really the difference. ultimately.

our silly animal instincts fear nonexistence the most of everything in the everything that exists in any way possible. but that's stupid: nonexistence is unexperiencable, so we'd not experience any supposed downsides of nonexisting. existence is simply "desired"; for no reason. bc how is it better than nonexistence? what FOR is it better? and what for that sth would be better, and not sth else? and if logic exists differently on the hypothetical fundamental level, what drives it?

what for did god create himself? blah blah blah.

and what does it all matter, >>>really<<<?

here's the most mysterious deepest trick ever:

without nonexistence >>>one can't really know existence<<<. but since we don't know nonexistence, bc that'd require us to exist as we don't exist which is fundamentally impossible aka a paradox (#smrtwords), we'll never truly comprehend existence. that's why it's such a mystery (well, more like that's about 37% of that reason. still: a good chunk. chonky boi).

and so we're all madder here than there

and the cheshire cat's grin is grinnier than never.

🥴

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existence is a constant question that questions itself that questions itself that questions itself ... . hence my god is a ?.

i only know nothing and we're all playing a game with rules that don't have any point or goal or cause or logic and if they're not logical then why would they be at all? if there was no logic behind the logic of the logic of our reality, it all could as well be dynamic chaos of everchanging formless plasma. or blinks of atoms. or square thoughts shining like sand across the river.

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point is, if u have fun, that's all that matters [to nothing].

the determinism or chaos is not experienced as such, so on the practical level, to our brains, it really doesn't matter what's the truth. in the end

we're still prisoners to our self-preservation instincts that rush us to get food and eat each other if we don't have access to anything else. but we don't rly dislike that. coz that'd be fundamentally against said instincts aka impossible. so, enjoy the forced enjoyment. it feels free and alive and lofty. it feels fulfilling. that's all that [doesn't] matters.

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idek what idek.

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it's abnormal to have cognition as developed as humans do. no other animal ruminates over the nonexistent point of its existence. we're an anomaly.

so what.

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12.10.24, 1.11.24 (opublikowany 1.11.24)

Btw idk wtf wattpad is doing but i didnt get notifs for the previous three chapters here so >>