looking for validation
love acceptance recognition admiration
is easy but it's hard
costs a lot of self and wastes a lot of life
trying to fit into expectations, stumbling on questionable roads, fighting with conflicting goals.
so
i gave that up.
it was the easiest but it's also been hard
still on the path, it's a journey with no finish line
hard to find out how and then follow it
we're all processes, forever ongoing
but
i've reached a checkpoint and from here on now
i'm proud of the man i've become.
i can say
i see me, i'm valid
i've put effort, i've struggled. i still do
but i care about me.
and the words are alive. they feel real and true
not like some dissociated fake, an ice statue, beautiful and shiny. no.
they're deep. bloody, throbbing
breathing, beating, ALIVE
i'm living them.
that's all i know. for now.
is it perfect? do i not stumble, get annoyed with myself, yadda yadda?
sure. it's just brain. but if a good baseline is there, it doesn't matter
in the end.
.
.
.
14.7.24 (opublikowany 15.7.24)
CZYTASZ
heart beats
Poesía~ poezje itp ~ w gruncie rzeczy, jesteśmy worami mięsa, kości, i flaków. ale w tym worze mieści się mózg, a mózg to wciąż niezbadana złożoność, która z prostego wora potrafi uczynić święty graal. the heart beats/heartbeats/heartbeat: serce bije, ser...
