My Little Black Swan- A Chris Motionless Fan-fiction

I cant be seen as weak

Play song for better reading experience xx

-Madelyn's POV-
---
Time swallowed us whole and winter had swooped in. Christmas was weeks away ice and frost had coated the buildings for Scranton.
Never have I even wished that summer was here again. But the cold always makes it harder to breathe.
But I don't care, I inly care for the beautiful site that I get to whiteness every day.
My body was weak and the chemo has been eating my flesh alive. Some girls called me a an anorexic zombie whilst I was getting changed for gym class,
I guess their right, my skin is grey and my ribs and spine is now seeping through like ink on paper.
But fuck, I would be dead if I let it bother me.
The only person keeping me going is-
"You all packed ?" Smiled floss offering me some pretzels,
"Yep almost" I smiled putting my hand in the bag,
"It's gonna be so much fun!  And that Dylan boy seems please were sharing a lodge huh huh" she grinned nudging me.
"He is probably pleased he is going with people that are total jerks" I sighed,
" oh because ' I can't wait to hang out with Madelyn more' is just a friendly thing"
"Shut up" I blushed,
The bell rang and we grabbed our books and headed out of the library.
"Hey you wanna come to my place and chill" asked floss as we both headed out of the school.
"Sorry I can't I'm helping dad packing for his tour"
"Aww okay tell Chris I said hello then, Seeya Maddy!"
"Seeya!"
I headed down the street and noticed Dylan walking next to me,
"Hey"
"Hey"
"Listen I'm glad your coming on this trip and all but your dad does know that we are gonna be staying in a snowy biome right?"
"I didn't want to tell him incase he would worry, he has work to do,"
"Fine but your sticking by my side the whole time"
"Why would you care you barely even know me" I rolled my eyes crossing the other side of the street.
Pulling my jacket sleeves down due to the cold.
He ran behind me,
I stepped in the pavement and almost slipped on some ice which is where Dylan caught me and helped me stand steady.
"Cause I worry" he said softly lifting my chin with his finger.
I stared at him for half a second with tired eyes, blank faced until I shook myself out of it.
I looked down and sighed, "your not the only one that thinks that" I walked away sadly, my sinks, boney arms hugging myself as I walked away from him.

"Hey wait up!"
I got to my street and was about to head through the driveway gate when my arm was tugged.
"Hey, wait- just talk for a minute"
"Why?"
"Please? Was it doe thing I said I'm sorry-
"It's fine, I'm fine just go home Dylan"
"No tell me, Maddy darling please"
"Go home Dylan"
"Maddy-
"Dylan. Go home"

It needed at that.
He left the drive and I walked up the small hilly drive to the large castle like house. The frist in the car shimmered In the peach sunset.
I headed inside and was greeted by my dad, who was all packed up at the door.
I flashed a fake smile and gave him a kiss in the cheek,
"You need help with anything"
"Nah I think I'm okay, vinny came over to help me with my shit so we're all set to head off tonight and your all set for this trip tomorrow huh"

"Yes"
"You looking forward to it?"
"Yeah dad, I am actually"
"Good girl, now I'm gonna shower okay" he smiled giving me a firm yet loveless hug.
He's been like this for months. I guess his mind has been too caught up with work recently that we barely even talk or stand near each other anymore. I would cook him dinner or I would cook my own,
The dining table is just a table for one.
Sunday roasts have been replaced with late night ramen or fast food for us both.
I lost my appetite for most foods Anyways. I feel the chemo destroying my insides that I have to throw up after I eat most nights.
I still smile though.
I lay on my bed listening to the cure on vinyl when I heard some stones being thrown at my bedroom window,
I sighed and got up seeing of course Dylan in the front garden,
I rolled my eyes and headed outside.
"Sorry I couldn't find a cheesier way to get your attention" he shrugged.
"Can we talk?"
I nodded,
We headed out to the woods. Which I haven't been in years, I guess after I got cancer I stayed indoors most the time.
"What's this" chuckled Dylan touching a wooden sign which spelled out.
HEDGEHOG HOTEL
I smiled, "oh yeah, I forgot about that, I used to have a wild hedgehog and i made him a home"
"Wow cute"
These woods held so many childhood memories.
A broken wasps nest, footprints from banshee back when he used to run that is,
A old tie from the man that tried to rape and kill me.
In a way I totally forgot about them but they always stayed in the back of my head.
We sat on the bench and stared out onto the main road.
" I'm sorry if I hurt you before about what I said"
I looked down,
-Dylan's POV-
"Please tell me, it's okay I'm not gonna judge"
"It's just-
She croaked and looked up again, tears collecting under her eye,
"I'm the cancer patent and everyone treats me like I'm some baby, I am made out to be weak and I don't want to be seen as weak" she sniffled,
"Why is that" I said softly taking her hand in mine,
"I had to take care of myself since birth, I had to scavenge and risk my life just so I could sleep that night with food in my stomach, my dad beat me and I had to keep it together for mine and my moms sake cause her baby got her mind off her husband" she cried
"I know your only looking out for me Dylan and I know you mean we'll but you don't have to worry about me"
"But I do!"
"Why?!"
"Cause I love you!"
There was a silence in the air,
Our breaths which were visible in the air as they collided.
We both pressed our lips together, keeping the warmth in our faces.
I pulled away,
"I still can't do this" I shook my head,
"What again?!"
I walked away,
"Stop playing games with me Maddy!"
"I'm sorry I just- you don't understand "
"Maddy!"
"Don't call me that!"
I headed inside at once.

Hey guys
Hope your all okay,
I decided to make this chapter longer than usual due to the lack of updates this week.
Anyways me and my mum had a big argument which resulted in tears so I'll keep this short.
I love you guys
Comment what you think it really helps.
Seeya
Gem
Xxx